Let me return to her
by AngelusSe
Summary: What if Buffy was there when Angel turned into Angelus? When Angel turned his feelings for Buffy where so strong that he passed them on to his demon self. Now its a battle between the Angelus and Angel for Buffys heart. Will she save Angel or have Angelus
1. The turn

It had been amazing, everything about that night had been more then words could describe. She lay there, in his arms, deep in slumber. He didn't want to wake her for the whole world. He stroked her hair while he thought and remember all of last night's details. It was her seventieth birthday and they had almost lost each other forever. She still had the ring he gave her and he always kept his on, he would never ever take it off for the rest of eternity.

"I love you," He whispered in her ear.

She softly woke her eye lids fluttering and her lips curling into a smile the second she saw Angel.

"I love you too," Buffy whispered leaning towards Angel.

"I love you," He said again before he kissed her, it was a soft kiss that seemed to go for hours.

When they broke apart Angel smiled, "More then you will ever know."

Buffy smiled and was just about to say something when Angel shrieked in agony.

He let go of her immediately and launched himself off of the bed.

"ANGEL!" Buffy screamed jumping off of the bed as well and just managing to catch him.

He was shaking from head to foot and trying to get out of her grip.

"Angel? Calm down it's me," She whispered in his ear, she wasn't the only one shaking and both her and Angel fell to the floor.

He turned his head to face her; she read the emotions on his face easily, the same where mirrored on hers. Fear. Panic. Terror. Loss. Worry. Shock. Love.

His face was drenched with sweat and looked ghostly. Shakily only just managing to, he put both of his hands to her face and brought it closer to his.

Tears where streaming down both of their faces.

"What's happening?" She breathed.

Angel roared in pain, the sight terrified Buffy Anne Summers.

She'd seen things in this world that where only in peoples nightmares and she hardly ever got scared. But this, seeing her one and only love collapse and go through such agony was the worst thing she had ever seen.

"Buffy it's got to be the curse," Angel said taking a deep breath between every word he said. His shaking had never stopped and he seemed like an innocent child all lost with no hope of ever returning to the person he loves.

Buffy remembered, Angel had told her all about his curse. He could never be able to experience a moment of true happiness without losing his soul in return. But what had he done to experience true happiness? Then realisation hit her. She shuddered realising she had caused this. Her hands held onto Angels face as well. She couldn't lose him, he was her everything. And she was obviously his everything.

"I can't lose you," She whispered looking straight into his eyes.

They were turning from his normal colour into pitch black. The sight terrified her it was obvious she was soon going to see the creature that was inside of him.

"I can't," She stuttered holding onto him harder, "Don't leave me, don't do this to me!"

It was obvious he was trying to suppress the demon inside of him as long as he could.

His hands where falling from her face, he was losing his grip on his soul.

She firmly placed his hands back to her face. He could feel the tears they wouldn't stop he hated to cause her such pain. He wanted to confront the demon inside of him and defeat it. But he was too weak. He couldn't talk; he couldn't tell her that he loved her. That he needed her. Tears where streaming down his cheek as he tried with all of his might to hold on to the only person he had ever loved.

"I'm not worth it, I'm not worth this!" Buffy screamed at him.

Maybe if she convinced him that she wasn't what he thought she was; that she wasn't important. Maybe if she could do this he would think it and their true happiness hadn't happened.

"I'm a stupid little girl who has done so much wrong in her life that I don't deserve you. I. AM. NOT. WORTH. THIS!" She screamed at him yet again.

Sadness crossed Angel's eyes he tried to talk to her to tell her she was worth this agony that he would even go to hell and back for her.

His eyes were almost completely black now Buffy knew she only had second left with him.

"I love you," She whispered pressing her head to his.

"Buffy," Angel managed to croak out but he was stopped as her lips pressed down hard against his.

They knew this would be their last kiss and made the most at it. As their lips pressed together so did their tears. The kiss was soft but only lasted a second.

A ripple went through Angel's entire body but he tried to resist it as he kissed his soul mate. But it had him and he knew it. Angel was no more.

Buffy realised the moment Angel was gone and that her lips where no longer pressed against her lovers but the thing that killed him.

Angelus seemed to have woke from a very deep sleep. He couldn't believe what that fool of his human soul self had done to him. He now had feelings towards a slayer. He felt repulsed but yet he couldn't stop. Maybe if he was lucky she hadn't realised yet that her boyfriend had disappeared. He made the kiss more intense; he slowly slid his hands down the young blonde's petite figure. But within seconds of him doing so he could feel her just about to break away. Before she could reject him fully Angelus clasped his hands on her shoulders and shoved her back. Buffy slammed into the wall.

Tears where still streaming down her pretty face.

"Hey honey," Angelus said in a mocking voice, "I'm home."

Buffy looked up slowly not being able to believe it. She didn't want to argue with the demon, she hadn't got enough strength for that, she wanted the truth.

"Will I ever get him back?" She sobbed.

Angelus laughed and strolled over to the heartbroken girl. He bent down low to stare in her eyes. When he saw the sadness in them part of him wanted to comfort her but the majority part wanted to kill her therefore ending the possibility that Angel will come and ruin his life again.

"But I am here doll," He laughed standing up.

"Angel," She said through gritted teeth.

"Oh him," Angelus waved a hand aside, "He's gone, no coming back for Angel the vampire with a soul. Sorry sweet pea."

Buffy shakily rose to her feet and stood face to face with Angelus. She looked into his eyes and grabbed his face pulling him towards her.

Angelus felt disgusted but wanted to see what the slayer would do so he let her go along with her little game.

"Angel I know you're in there," She whispered scanning his eyes, "I love you."

Angelus rolled his eyes.

"And I will get you back," She said with definite certainty in her voice.

Angelus snorted and slammed Buffy into the ground once more.

She was too weak to fight back and she didn't even want to.

"Dream on school girl," Angelus said moving towards the door, "Your boyfriend is dead."


	2. Finding Buffy

Hi everyone hoped you enjoyed my first part. I tried to make this a little longer. All characters do not belong to me like I wish they did. No copyright intended.

Please review it means a lot to me.

Spike sensed it. The moment Angelus returned he could feel threw his entire body. He needed to find his sire but he couldn't leave Drusilla. She was in such a terminal state she wasn't up to travelling.

"Dru," He called staring at the insane vampire he called his lover.

Drusilla was talking to her class of dolls. She liked to pretend that they were real and she was teaching them the vampire ways. A young girl, probably seventeen years of age was quivering in the hold of Drusilla's arms as she pulled each lock behind the girls neck softly and slowly.

"Dru," Spike repeated entering the room and sighed at the sight, "Why don't you just get it over with and eat the bloody meal? Seriously Dru your acting more like her mother, grant you a scary mother but still. Eat the damned human!"

Drusilla made a moan and a sob at the same time she knew it broke Spike down when he was mad. He loved her after all.

"If you don't mind," Spike said stepping round and peering menacingly into the girls face, "I have some business to address with your mother."

Drusilla gave a tiny snarl and turned to the dolls.

"The younger the blood the better it is," Drusilla whispered to them putting the last of the girls lock behind her neck, "And the prettier the human," Drusilla softly sank her teeth into the young girls neck.

The girl screamed in agony and if Spike hadn't of caught her she would have fallen to the floor. She thought the man standing in front of her might save her but quickly realised that he was only holding her so Drusilla could keep drinking. As the final light left her eyes Drusilla gently lowered the girl to the floor, her face was covered in blood.

"Who's a mucky puppet?" Spike teased wiping the blood off with his hand then licking it.

Once all the teasing was over Spike told Drusilla that Angelus had returned and he must see him. Drusilla moaned but Spike claiming he was his own man left her with a couple of humans and set off to find Angelus.

"Giles it has been a whole two days and not me and Willow have had even a glimpse of Buffy," Xander said worriedly.

"She's probably just with Angel hanging out, occasionally snogging every now and then thinking about it she probably is snogging him and more," Willow trailed off looking at the two men's faces and realising she was saying to much but couldn't stop herself, "Like she was saying the other day she was ready."

Fury came into Xander Harris eyes as he thought of the Buffster who yes did say she didn't want anything to do with him the way he hoped, but he still had hope she would see what a dead thing Angel is and come to the living.

"I mean…I mean they are probably at his place having cups of tea and not doing anything at all in the," Willow paused, "You know the, oh you know what department I mean."

Giles didn't want to hear anymore about his slayer with a vampire, "Willow please be quiet."

Willow shut her mouth instantly and Xander stood up from his chair.

"Anyway Willow the best place to check his Angels place for Buffy first."

Giles gathered all his books and hid them in his office.

"I'll go," Xander said before anyone could even stop him he was out of the library and making his way to Angels.

Xander Harris had always felt something towards Buffy Summers since the first day he met her. Part of him knew he never had a chance and should just be content with being one of her best friends but that wasn't enough for Xander and he knew it never would be. He made his way quickly to Angels but found himself slowing as he approached. What if they were going at it like Willow had implied? Should he interrupt them or just leave them? Should he make his presence known? Probably not, he thought, _Buffy might be my best friend but she would never forgive me for that. _

He got to the door but couldn't here anything. He debated for a bit on whether or not he should listen to see what he could hear. _It could mentally scar me for life but she is my best friend I need to know what is going on._

Pressing his ear lightly to the door he did not hear what he expected. He heard sobs.

He could tell instantly that they were Buffy's.

_I am so going to kill that dead thing, _Xander thought as he opened the door and gasped at the sight before him.

The slayer, his best friend, Buffy Anne Summers, was in the corner of the bedroom. The walls where cracked and some of the floorboards were missing beneath her. Her face was pale and wet with tears. She was still crying and her body was thinner then usual. She hadn't eaten in two days. By the look of things she hadn't done anything for the past two days except cry.

It was the first time she had stopped crying in two days when she saw her best friend standing in front of her like her own guardian angel. He shone with light as he bent down and peered in her eyes.

"Buffy?" He whispered seeing nothing but sadness in those deep eyes of hers.

He would have got lost in them but his best friend needed him and he needed to put those sorts of feelings beside him.

"I'm here Xander," She croaked taking his hand that he held out to her.

She staggered to her feet and lent against him as he supported her out of the building.

But before they left she turned round and whispered, "I'll get you back."

It was meant for Angel but Xander had no clue what Buffy was on about.

"Come on girl," He said supporting her all the way back to the school and back to the library where Giles, Willow and Oz where waiting for her.

Xander set her down on a chair and that was the first time he noticed what she was wearing. Nearly nothing. Her nighty was wet and clinging to her but it was torn and revealed some of her stomach and almost her left breast.

Giles heart pulled as he saw what he liked to think of his daughter in complete and total misery and not at all up to slaying. The council would kill him. _Stuff the council, _Giles he whispered to Oz to go and get some clothes from lost and found.

"Won't they think it's a bit weird," Oz said not taking his eyes off of the poor girl, "I mean it is girl's clothes after all."

"Oh for heaven sake Oz just go!" Giles sighed trying not to raise his voice.

Oz ran out of the library and Willow stared after him for a minute before remembering her best friend and suddenly felt guilty.

"Buffy what happened," She said kneeling before her best friend and taking her hand.

Buffy snapped out of her trance and registered everything around her.

"Angel," She simply croaked.

"That bastard," Xander said angrily not realising what Buffy meant.

Buffy stood up fire in her eyes as she approached Xander she wanted to hurt him.

Giles stepped in between the two before anything else could happen.

Buffy seeing her father as she liked to think of him stopped in her tracks.

"Ok maybe not 'that bastard'," Xander said over Giles shoulder.

Buffy gave a small smile and threw herself on Xander. Xander cried out in pain as Buffy hug squeezed him making breathing almost impossible. It was obvious she needed to be comforted and with a look that told Giles and Willow this he hugged her back.

They managed to help Buffy threw the day, Xander convinced her to eat, Willow convinced her that at the moment she is in need of some personal hygiene. Oz got her some clothes; apparently the women he had asked had given him a funny look for asking for girl's clothes and Giles finally convinced her to tell everyone what had happened. It was hard for Buffy and she took a lot of deep breaths as she told them her tale.

"It's all my fault," She whispered, "I killed him."

There was a deathly silence has Willows arm tightened around Buffy's shoulders and squeezed Oz's hand quite hard. He didn't moan though he was deep in thought. Giles was shocked and Xander was quite happy but managed to act concerned.

"Don't talk like that Buffster," Xander said, "What happened?"

"We got back to his," Buffy didn't really want to share her most intimate moment with her friends no matter how close to her they where, "And he, me, we."

Buffy stopped short and looked at everyone's faces. Giles didn't look disappointed as she thought he would but pity was on his face instead. Oz felt sorry for her. Xander was furious and Willow was in awe but sadness since she knew that this story wasn't a fairytale.

"Anyway I woke up and he told me he loved me then something happened. He launched himself away from me. It was like he was someone else."

Xander managed to hold back a nasty comment about Angel just wanting to get in her pants and not caring for her.

"His face went really pale."

Xander managed to hold back another comment.

"He was shaking all over it scared me. I've seen so many things," She whispered staring at them all, "But nothing has scared me that much."

Giles thought about Angel's curse and realised almost instantly what had occurred this.

"His one moment of true happiness," He whispered to read Buffy's expression.

She nodded weakly, "It's all my fault, if I hadn't done it he would still be here."

The Scooby gang didn't know how to react to this piece of news. Willow wanted to hide in shame at the fact that she still had a boyfriend whereas Xander wanted to punch a wall, _but that would hurt _he thought simply.

"So because he had one true moment of happiness he's dead?" Oz asked then paused, "I mean properly this time."

"No," Buffy said.

The gang was shocked all apart from Giles. If he wasn't fully dead then what happened to him?

"He's lost his soul," She whispered staring at a wall not knowing what to do with herself.

"Which means Angelus has returned," Giles stated for them.


	3. The simple plan

**Part 3. No copyright intended not for profit just for enjoyment. Please review it means a lot to me (next chapter coming tomorrow)**

Spike found Angelus easily; they were connected what with Angelus being his sire.

But where Spike found Angelus was another matter. He was in a deserted warehouse which was just a five minute walk from the slayers house. The Angelus he used to know had always been a demon with taste; he didn't run and hide from a little girl.

He lit a fag, took a puff and kicked open the door.

Angelus had been expecting him and didn't make a move as Spike walked in.

"With a little decoration, a few human bodies would do," Spike said observing Angelus new place, "It could be quite nice, like how dark it is."

"I'm glad you came William," Angelus said turning round to face Spike.

Spike hated his former human name and became enraged instantly.

"Spike it is to you and you know that. Now I felt a calling bringing me here what the hell do you want?"

Angelus chuckled a deep low chuckle, "I need help."

"Well that's bloody obvious just look where your living." Spike said pausing, "So then big man how did you loose your soul again?"

"The slayer," Angelus said quickly and quietly.

Spike sighed, "Ahh that one is trouble. But you great big poof was following her around like a little dog with your tongue hanging out," Spike said simply sitting on a chair and putting his feet up on a small table while taking another puff of his cigarette.

"Well mate things change," Angelus said not wanting to talk about it.

"Spit it out," Spike said simply.

"Did Darla ever tell you about the curse?" Angelus asked feeling a pang as he remembered that he/Angel had killed her.

"Before you killed her? Sure something about gypsies. That one could talk for eternity she could."

Angelus ignored the feeling of anger, he was no longer interested in Darla, and well he hoped not anyway.

Spike thought about the conversation with Darla, he felt like it was yesterday that it had happened. Apparently her poor demon had been cursed with a soul and was now like a human. But if he had one moment of true happiness then Angelus would return. He couldn't remember the conversation too well. After all it was only Angelus and Spike sometimes felt like killing him because of the way he acted around Drusilla. He was happy that he had his soul back. Now he couldn't ruin his and Dru's relationship any longer.

"So your soul self had his moment of true happiness then? What was it?" Spike asked interestingly but he already had a clue.

Angelus snarled and Spike realised his suspicions were right after all.

"I hear a slayer is supposed to be very good sex wise," Spike laughed, "So you my dear friend bedded a slayer?" He laughed harder, "I would have shagged them but I don't sink that low," He stood up, "They're good for one thing and one thing only," He grinned, "Killing."

Angelus didn't say anything he just stood watching Spike. The majority part of him was disgusted with himself but one part of him couldn't stand to have Buffy's name drag threw the dirt. He shook the Buffy feelings off instantly.

"She looked quite inexperienced so was she any good?" Spike asked curiously.

"For a human," Angelus said wanting to say she was better then anything but holding it back.

Spike saw the look in Angelus face, he was disgusted but amused.

"HA you still have feelings for her," Spike laughed sitting back down, "Let me guess that poof Angels feelings where so strong for her," He pulled an 'aww' face, "He's transferred them to you?"

Angelus nodded, "It's disgusting that's what it is. She is a human, a slayer! I am a respectable vampire and should not have to put up with a little schoolgirl tainting my feelings, my every movement, tainting my none existent heart!"

"Then leave. Get her out of your mind and leave me out of it, I want to go flipping back home and you, you big softie have called me here to what? Listen to you drool over some slayer who could kick your ass? I'd rather heave."

"She made me feel human," Angelus said angrily.

Spike grinned realising Angelus fury at the young slayer.

"You want my help to get her gone don't you," He said.

It wasn't a question, he already knew the answer.

Buffy was grounded. She hadn't been home for two days and looked a mess when she had. Her mother only suspected one thing which had happened, sex. But her Buffy was careful and clever and most of all she usually informed her mum on her were abouts. Joyce didn't want to see her daughters face not only because she was mad but because there was a sadness there that she knew could never be wiped clean until her drama had been sorted out. She told Buffy to go to her room and not come out except going to the bathroom. Willow was up there with her. Buffy might be grounded but Joyce knew she needed a friend and Willow seemed the best for her at the moment.

"We will get him back," Willow said firmly, "But acting like this you won't."

She had tried comforting her best friend, had tried everything to get her to respond to her at all. But one thing she had not tried was firmness.

Buffy had told Willow every single thing which had happened between her Angel and Angelus. It made Willows heart cry and couldn't bear to see Buffy go through this.

"You promised him you would get him back," Willow said.

Buffy's head snapped up and looked at Willow and as Willow talked the sadness in her eyes was half replaced by determination.

"And you will get him back," Willow said firmly grasping Buffy's hand.

Buffy managed to speak, "How?"

Willows face brightened she was getting Buffy to do something.

"Research!" She announced like it was the most obvious thing to do.

Buffy gave a small but weak smile at her friend if it wasn't for Willow Buffy would probably never do anything ever again.

"But first you need a wash so you get in the shower," Willow smiled pointing to the shower door, "I'm going to the library to get some books I'll be back really soon."

She stood up and looked Buffy in the eye, "You'll be ok till then wont you?" She asked concerned.

Buffy made yet another small smile and nodded.

Willow returned with five books on vampires and souls. She found Buffy properly dressed in jeans and a white t-shirt. If this was a happier occasion Willow might have pointed out she couldn't wear white that much anymore. She was sat crossed legged on her bed staring at the wall. When Willow opened her door she eagerly grabbed the books and started reading.

Willow was happy to get such a response out of her; there was still hope for Angel yet.

Angelus and Spike had been talking best tactics for over powering the slayer for at least two hours. So far they had planned on waiting two more hours when the sun had gone down and hold a friend of hers hostage so she would have to meet them at the warehouse. It was a very simple plan but they were still arguing over which friend to take.

"Personally I want to get the red haired girl," Spike said.

He knew the little witch had power and if they got her off from Buffy sooner they were a whole lot safer.

Angelus wanted to take Xander. He had lied to Spike and said it was because the human boy had no powers and defiantly couldn't get the better of them.

But Angelus knew his true reason for wanting Xander. And even though it disgusted him he did feel for the slayer. He wanted to kill Xander because he was in love with her, he was her best friend and he could see her in the sunlight. But Angelus knew that once Buffy Summers was dead these feelings must be wiped from him.

"Fine," Spike said giving in, "We take the boy but I want first bite."

Giles, Xander and even Oz had been in the library for hours looking at the history of Angelus. They were all sick to their stomachs and anxious about what he would do to Buffy.

"This one is even worse then the first one!" Xander said comparing Angel to Angelus and even admitting Angel was better.

Oz gave Xander a disapproving look and got back to researching.

Giles needed to say something to Xander; if Xander was making comments like this around the slayer he would not only lose his life but probably hurt her feelings in the process.

"Xander I know you have feelings for Buffy but no matter how much you resent Angel it was clearly obvious that him and Buffy where in love and still are in love if we manage to find the cure." Giles wondered what Xander was thinking.

_What if Xander took that the wrong way and didn't want to do any research so he could have a shot at Buffy Summers?_

"What would you rather do to Buffy?" Giles asked him, "Let her be without the man she loves and miserable her whole life while being terrorized by the demon inside of him or have a happy Buffy in love and with a man she loves?"

Xander knew Giles was right but couldn't look him in the eye any longer since Giles knew all along what he had been thinking. He left the library within ten minutes putting his books back on the desk. As he left Giles picked them up and shared them between himself and Oz.

"Better re check those just in case," Giles advised watching Xander leave.

Xander walked along home with he's hands in his pockets thinking about Buffy and Angel. It was true they loved each other but he loved Buffy. Why did the nice guy never get a break? He thought to himself, _Angel is a nice guy, _part of him thought.

"Demon," Xander corrected himself out loud.

"That's me," A voice said from behind him.

Xander whipped round to see Angelus in front of him. He still looked the same, apart from the eyes, they were so cold and mean.

"Don't forget me," Another voice said.

It was easier to recognise Spikes voice compared to Angelus voice. Angelus had a mean edge to it that Angels never did; it shocked Xander to his very core.

He turned round once more to see a cheerful Spike grinning from ear to ear.

"Oh look who it is," Xander said, "Tweedle dumb and tweedle dee," He paused, "I'm just not sure which one is which."

Spikes grin faltered a bit and he grabbed Xander's neck by the back.

"Hey now fella's," Xander said becoming quite worried about his well being, "No need to be rash."

Angelus was trying as hard as he could not to rip the boys head off right then and there. He knew Angel didn't have a fond taste for him making Angelus taste a hell of a lot worse. Xander managed to turn round to face Angelus he was shocked by the coldness and madness of his face. He had thought about pleading with him but changed his mind in almost an instant.

"So what's the drill? I'm the tasty new sack?" Xander said not quite believing what was happening to him.

"I would have really preferred to get the red haired girl," Spike said sneering, "She wouldn't have talked as much and her pleading would have been a great sight."

Xander froze the second he realised they were talking about Willow.

"You touch just one hair on her head I'll-" Xander began.

"You'll what? Get_ your_ Buffy on us?" Angelus laughed, "She's coming don't worry we are making sure of it."

And with that Spike dragged Xander to Buffy's house with Angelus just behind.


	4. I need you to meet me

**Hi everyone thanks so much for the reviews they mean so much to me and are really great so thank you again and please keep reviewing. Again no copyright intended made for enjoyment not profit and as much as I wish it did, absolutely nothing belongs to me.**

* * *

Buffy felt him coming before he even appeared at her window sill. It still scared her how he looked like the man she loved but was something she could never love now. His face was not loving, kind and gentle like she had remembered but cold, angry and evil. For once he actually looked like a vampire. But she would rather see him like this then not see him at all. Willow was deeply shocked at the changes in Angel's face. She didn't know what to expect but certainly not this and certainly not the coldness he radiated at Buffy. Buffy stood up very quickly from her bed and Angelus gave a chuckle. Willow went to go and stand next to her best friend. She felt powerful now that she had been practising magic.

"I need you to meet me," Angelus said eyeing Buffy.

Buffy gave one quick nod and turned to Willow with eyes that warned her not to come. When she turned round to follow Angelus to where ever he wanted to meet her he had already vanished. But it didn't matter she would find him and soon.

"I need you to pretend I'm still up here so my mum doesn't get worried or parental again," Buffy said to her and then moved to the window.

Willow grabbed her arm and Buffy turned round, "Buffy, you might need to take weapons."

The reason why struck Buffy straight away as she realised Angelus would hurt her as he had already done so and it might be a fight to the deaf. Or her death more like. She would never kill him, she just couldn't and she was sure he knew that. But part of her believed Angel was still in there and that Angelus wouldn't be able to kill her. She shook her head softly sadness covering her face once more and made to go out the window again.

However, Willow grabbed her arm again, "It's not Angel anymore," She said softly, "You need to remember that."

Buffy nodded and went out through the window.

She managed to find Angelus quickly and easily. She tracked him and two others back to an old abandoned warehouse. She knew instantly that Angelus has back up from the tracks and probably a human hostage from the other. Sometimes vampire's plans were so simple and easy to figure out they got boring for Buffy.

She now wished that she had brought a weapon for whatever other vampire was with Angelus.

"She'll come for me," Xander argued just before Angelus gagged him.

Angelus sneered, "She doesn't even know you are here boy. If she comes here it will be for me."

Realisation hit Xander as he realised with a sinking heart that Angelus was right. He tried to speak however and kept trying until Spike got annoyed and yanked the gag off of him.

"The boy wants to talk Angelus and quite frankly it amuses me you two fighting over a slayer."

Angelus ignored Spike as Xander grinned and addressed Angelus.

"She won't be coming for you either," Xander glared at him as Angelus snarled knowing what name he was going to say next, "She would be coming for Angel."

Angelus knew then as anger surged inside of him that he did love the slayer. No matter how disgusting or repulsive the idea was he did love her. He didn't know if Spikes theory had been right and that Angels feelings for the young girl had been so strong they had now been transferred to him or that he loved her from the moment he first saw her. And he had seen all of her.

"That's why I've come," Said a soft voice from behind them.

All three looked at the small slayer or seemed terribly fragile and weak. Spike licked his lips, he knew loves bitch and he knew that girl was heart broken there fore easy to get rid of. He was imaging the taste of her blood in his mouth, he would have to take some back for Dru. Angelus face faltered from the hard cold and evil look he had worn to a soft gentle look for just a moment. It had only been a second but Buffy saw it and her heart melted. But she wasn't the only one who had seen it, so had Xander and Spike. Xander couldn't believe his eyes, he had seen that look on Angels face so many times, that look of love and couldn't believe a cruel heartless creature like Angelus could love her as well. _If he gets her life just isn't fair, _Xander thought madly. He would prefer Buffy with a vampire with a soul then an evil demon or would love to kill him.

Spike laughed the second he saw it, "No wonder Angelus you wanted her rid of straight away, if she stays alive any longer you'll turn into a big poof just like your human part!"

Buffy kept repeating the words again and again in her head till they made sense to her. Was Spike saying Angelus was in love with her? The minute she thought this Angelus snorted and her question flew out of her head just like she flew out of the window moments later by a punch from Spike. She landed on her feet; she had seen Xander and hadn't even said 'hi' to him yet. That was just plain rude and the fact that she hadn't rescued him yet was even ruder. She ran back in with her hands balled into fists.

"Dolly's ready to play," Spike sneered and him and Buffy started fighting.

Xander watched the scene before his eyes. The young girl fighting a much bigger vampire with his fangs ready to strike at her bear neck. He realised that she hadn't brought a single weapon with her not even her cross that Angel had given her about a year ago which she had never taken off since. Her fighting was a little off but not bad Xander noted. As the slayer and the vampire fought Xander saw Angelus with a shadow of doubt on his face. It was obvious the vampire wanted to join in the fight and to Xander's horror obvious that he loved the girl.

It seemed Buffy was winning the fight, she had kicked Spikes legs from underneath him and Spike fell.

Spike glared at his sire, "Come on big guy this was your idea. Help a guy out."

Angelus shook off his feelings for Buffy and approached her. The minute he did she had stopped fighting Spike to look at him. He could see love and fear burning in the girl's eyes. He wanted to get rid of the fear but part of him wanted to get rid off the love too. But he realised that part was a very small part of him now.

Spike saw his chance and sprung up on a surprised Buffy and pinned her to the floor.

She struggled but she was still weak and couldn't push Spike off of her.

"So," Spike said with a sneer on his face, "This is what it feels like to be on top."

One hand was on her neck pinning her down but another squeezed her thigh. He turned his head to smile at Angelus.

"Feels good," Spike noted licking his lips.

Angelus gave a grim smile to Spike. Inside he was resisting the urge to push Spike off of her and stake him. But if Spike hurried and got on with it he might no longer feel these feelings.

Spike bent his head to Buffy's, "Now then this wont hurt," He smiled reassuringly then he thought again, "It will hurt a hell of a lot."

"Buffy!" Xander called urging against the ropes that held him in place.

He kept struggling as Spike bent his mouth to Buffy's neck.

Buffy knew it was the end. Angelus wouldn't save her he wanted to get rid of her.

"I love you," She whispered to Angelus but everyone knew it was for Angel.

Spike turned round to his sire to comment on how sweet that was but as his head was half way he was forced off of the girl. He was being hit into the ground again and again by a very powerful demon. He tried to fight back but was in to much shock.

He spat blood from his mouth and looked at Angelus.

"You great big poof," He shouted hitting him.

Angelus fell to the floor.

Buffy ran to un tie Xander and looked at the scene unfolding before her. She couldn't believe what was happening. She believed that Angel had come through for her and didn't see the truth behind it all. The truth being that a vampire was in love with her and would protect her against his own kind even his own family.

Spike marched to the door but glared at them all and shouted, "You haven't changed! You will never change! You, you gigantic idiot of a demon!" He then turned from Angelus to address Buffy, "He still loves you, you know," He saw the shock on Buffy's face and thought about causing Angelus pain.

It was obvious Buffy was nothing without Angel and it was obvious to Spike that Angelus wanted to be with her without Angel. Spike hated both Angelus and Angel and decided he liked Angel better and Angel a favour and possibly destroy Angelus at the same time.

"He doesn't love you though," Spike sneered nodding his head in the direction of Angelus, "Angel does. He's still in there. The big poof's love for you was so strong that he's transferred it to Angelus. Now then princess you have to decide," Spike said staring at a horrified Buffy, "Angel or Angelus?"

And with that he left.

Buffy simply stared at Angelus. Love was in her eyes and she wanted more then anything to go up to him and through her arms around him and be comforted and loved once more. But she knew who she wanted and loving a replacement of him will not help get him back.

Angelus was still on the floor; blood was covering him from head to foot. He stared at Buffy's face and hoped the love in her eyes was for him. He slowly got up but fell down again.

When Buffy didn't come to support him he realised she wanted Angel. Hatred filled his eyes once more as he stared at her. He gave a loud laugh.

"Sure," He laughed, "Sure I'd love a stupid whiny little school girl."

Buffy helped Xander up and together they walked to the exit.

"You so believed that didn't you?" Angelus laughed.

The laugh was completely fake he was only trying to convince Buffy that he felt absolutely nothing but hatred towards her.

"I believed the big poof bit," Xander cut in.

Angelus started towards Xander but Buffy cut in. She put both of her hands on his face like she had done a while ago. Angelus resisted the temptation to put his hands around her waist and pull her towards him. Where as poor Xander resisted the temptation to barf.

Buffy just simply stared into Angelus eyes searching for Angel. She saw a glimmer of him but showed no response to Angelus.

"Buffy?" Xander whispered staring at the two.

Buffy let her hands carefully drop from Angelus face and Angelus smiled.

"If you ever get him back you wont want him anymore," Angelus called after them as they both left.

He couldn't believe he had slipped up and revealed some of his true feelings towards the slayer.

* * *

Once Buffy was back in doors and Xander was home safe Willow performed a spell from a book she found which would keep vampires that had already been invited in out.

When she saw Buffy she decided not to ask and when Buffy had asked how the researching had gone Willow lied and told her nothing.

The truth of the matter was though that she was on the verge of something. But she didn't know if she was correct and was certainly not going to get Buffy's hopes up until she knew she had everything right.

* * *

**More coming tomorrow please review it means a lot to me**


	5. Admitting

**Hi everyone thanks for reviewing please continue here's the next part as promised. I realise I've made Buffy kind of heart broken and not being able to cope very much but that will change. Not completely though. I will try and bring her back to some sort of herself but with the sadness still there if you get what I mean. Angelus is yes in Angels body but he is the vampire side of him and is not Angel, he is like a different being (in this fanfic) so please don't get confused (you will see what I mean)**

**No copyright intended as much as I wish everything of Buffy the vampire slayer belonged to me it doesn't lol. **

* * *

Angel watched her leave. He wanted more then anything to run up to her and embrace her. Tell her he loved her and he was sorry for everything which had happened. But he couldn't. He was stuck, trapped with another being in his body. But that being, that demon could control his body and Angel had no way of stopping him. Last time when Angelus was in his body he hadn't been there at all. But now he was and the only reason he could think of was Buffy. She had kept him here.

Angelus was unaware that Angel still remained with him but the moment he felt Angels thought of Buffy Summers Angelus realised.

"Impossible," He whispered out loud slowly sitting down in the chair Spike had occupied.

"Obviously not," Angel thought menacingly.

They were communicating to each other through thought now. And it worried Angelus that if Angel could talk to him what if he managed to break through and control his/their body by himself?

"I wish I could," Angel said.

Angelus sneered, "Good luck," he thought.

"Good luck with Buffy," Angel shot back.

Angelus growled, if Angel was actually in a different body right now he knew it would be a fight to the deaf.

"Is it because of you that I feel this way?" Angelus asked.

"I hope so," Angel thought angrily, "Doesn't matter anyway you haven't got a chance."

Angelus got up and started to pace around the room, occasionally grinding pieces of furniture to dust in frustration.

"I do," Angelus said out loud, "She can be with me physically."

Angel didn't talk to Angelus anymore after that. He knew Angelus was right and didn't know what to say to that.

"So it looks likes a choice over you or sex with what looks like you," Angelus laughed sitting back down and knowing he would get peace from Angel for a good long while.

"He pushed Spike off of her?" Giles asked amazed, "He actually defended her?"

Xander simply nodded.

"Well that's interesting, very interesting," Giles whispered running around the library gathering what looked like to Xander as thousands of books but were only four.

Xander grabbed his coke and the top book from Giles pile. Giles stared at him.

"I'd rather have the first one back," Xander said shrugging, "He doesn't tie me up and keep me hostage."

Giles nodded and smiled at Xander.

"He actually defended you?" Willow asked amazed just like Giles.

Buffy smiled and nodded.

"That's brilliant that means Angels still in there somewhere!" She said jumping up and down, "Which means that he's not completely gone which means it could work which means we could get him back!" Willow shut up instantly realising she had said too much.

Buffy stopped and looked at her best friend, "What could work?" She asked.

"Well, it's just a spell in a book I found and its really complicated and well I couldn't tell you because I might not be able to do it and what if I cant do I would just be letting you down and Angel. It's just a spell that might not even work and-" She said seriously fast then stopped to stare at Buffy.

Buffy instantly became happier, "So we could get him back?"

"Well it's complicated like I said. But yes we could but it involves something you won't want to do."

Buffy stopped, "What?"

"The only way to find out if Angel is still in there is that Angelus loves you," Willow said hanging her head down in shame.

"So I have to make him love me?" Buffy asked now doubting the possibility she could get Angel back.

Willow simply nodded.

"I told him I would get him back," Buffy said to Willow, "So I will."

Willow smiled, "Shouldn't be to hard to get him to love you, just look at you."

Willow never admitted it but sometimes she envied Buffy for her looks and confidence but most of the time she just stood back and admired.

Buffy gave her a hug and told Willow her plan.

Angelus hadn't heard from Angel for the whole day which was brilliant, maybe he was finally fading. But he could feel a presence in the back of his head which indicated that Buffy Summers was coming.

Angelus didn't know how to act. Should he remain his calm cold self and pretend he only shows feelings of hate towards the girl or should he just completely open up to her and tell her everything?

He pondered the thought for several minutes before she entered. Angelus gave a slight grin at what she was wearing whereas Angel was appalled. Angel wouldn't have mind her dressing like this anywhere she wanted but it was clear what she intended and he knew Angelus was a monster and suddenly became frightened for his love.

_You should be, _Angelus thought nastily, _seems she chose the sex after all._

Angelus looked Buffy Summers up and down; she was wearing a short black mini skirt with black boots and a shirtless red top which showed quite a lot of her cleavage off.

_I really wish I hadn't taken Xander's advice now, _she thought.

Her outfit wasn't bad or slutty what so ever but it made her feel uncomfortable and vulnerable to unwanted males attention. And she was sure that if it came down to a fight that she would have to rip the skirt off since she couldn't really move her legs with it on.

"I need to talk to you," She said crossing her arms staring at Angelus.

He moved forward just an inch and looked at her in amazement, she hadn't moved back like he had expected and was satisfied with what he had just told Angel.

Angel on the other hand was distort what if Angelus was right? He wasn't anything special, why would someone like Buffy want him?

_Why indeed? _Thought Angelus.

Angelus moved forward yet another step not taking his eyes off of the slayer. She didn't flinch she hadn't even moved a muscle. Soon he was standing right against her and she had to look up to stare him in the eyes.

"Then talk," He said gruffly restraining himself from throwing himself upon her.

Angel made a tiny snarl as a warning to Angelus but Angelus just ignored it.

"I need to know if it was true," Buffy said staring in Angelus eyes.

He didn't know it but she was searching for traces of Angel. And unfortunately for Angel he hadn't realised it either.

Angelus gave a loud laugh and shoved Buffy to the floor. She staggered backwards then fell over. Luckily for her this was her plan.

"Of course!" He roared standing over her, "Your more stupid then I gave you credit for."

Buffy gave a weak smile, "What a shame," She whispered quite aware that Angelus could hear it.

Angelus was shocked. He thought that Buffy had come to mock him and now regretted his decision to hurt her. He was just about to offer his hand when she got up and with a last look at him left.

Angelus gave it five minutes before deciding to follow her. Angel was currently in a depressive state and staid locked up. Angelus followed her scent all the way to the club where her and the rest of her friends spent the remainder of their times. The Bronze. He saw Cordelia Chase give him a once over before he entered and he only just managed to stop himself from feeding on her.

He saw Buffy standing up talking to Willow and Xander by the pool table. She gave them a smile and nodded as they went off to dance. Angelus stood watching her for a moment; she really was a beauty but obviously too much of one since a boy grabbed her arm.

Turning round Buffy saw a tall teenager about her age probably just slightly older with black hair and olive skin. His hair was unbelievably greasy and he gave her a wide smile, "Want to dance?"

_This boy is really full of himself and this isn't part of the plan! _Buffy thought with panic. She knew Angelus was watching her, as planned, but this boy's interference was just a nuisance.

"No thank you," She said smiling, "But thanks for asking."

The boys smile faltered and then he thought and smiled again, "Ahh playing hard to get? I know how girls like that sort of thing."

Angelus stood watching the scene. He would give the boy a chance to go away and leave her alone but if he didn't take it Angelus would take some sort of action.

Angel was now awake again and Angelus sighed as he thought he had already got rid of his pain in the backside. Angel was furious and now doubtful. Whenever a human boy showed interest in Buffy he was always doubtful. What ever human boy it was could still take her out into the sun light, could make love to her without bringing her an evil demon and give her a normal life.

He was sure one day she would realise this and go with one. And he wouldn't blame her if she did.

Angelus ignored Angel's little outburst. He didn't think about stuff like that. He never doubted himself and why should he?

Buffy gave him a small smile and shook her head. She took her arm back but the boy grabbed hold of both this time.

Angelus had had enough. He was there within two seconds. Buffy pushed the boy back with a great force and the boy staggered. But he was persistent and marched back towards her. Buffy looked at Angelus. She was shocked, perhaps this was working out better then her original plan of making him want her through not being able to have her. The boy put both of his hands on Buffy's arms but Angelus removed them forcefully and the boy cried out in pain. Angelus then twisted both of the boy's arms and with a crack they snapped. The boy shrieked with pain and rage. He managed to run out with a few of his friends before anybody saw him crying.

Angelus turned to the exit since he had seen a security guard coming to address him. He didn't realise Buffy was following him until he was half way back to the warehouse.

He stopped to face her.

"Why did you do that?" She asked.

He noticed she had put a cardigan on which by the smell of he realised she had borrowed it from her friend Willow. It smelt of lavender and herbs.

Angelus just shrugged and turned away from her intent on going back to his home.

But a hand grabbed his and stopped him.

"You followed me, you stopped some moronic boy from harassing me," Buffy stated, "What do you want from me?"

It was a question that struck Angelus. What did he want from her? He wanted everything and that was a fact.

"Everything," He said as if it was the simplest thing in the world.

It was clear from the slayers face that she had not expected that answer but it was also clear that she was happy. She walked up to him and put both of her hands on his face and kissed him gently on the lips.

The kiss progressed however and Angelus hands snaked down to her waist and pulled her closer to him. They were pressed together and Angel was screaming in Angelus head but Angelus just ignored him and became happier that Buffy Summers had chosen him.

Buffy pulled apart slowly and whispered, "I love you."

"I love you too," Angelus smiled at her.

Buffy grinned and Angel was close from disappearing forever when he heard Buffy say, "That wasn't for you."

Angelus let go of her instantly and stood apart.

"It was him wasn't it?" He roared.

Buffy nodded and took a step forward, "It will always be for him."

Angelus was hurt and furious where as if Angel could he would do a little 'I won' dance.

Buffy stepped away backwards from Angelus and turned around to go tell Willow her part of the mission was completed.


	6. The pretence

**Hi everyone this is the next part as promised. No copyright intended everything belongs to rightful owners this is not made for profit but entertainment purposes. **

**Now on with the story.**

* * *

"So he actually admitted that he loved you?" Willow asked amazed.

Buffy smiled widely and nodded.

"Are you sure this is a wise idea?" Giles asked putting on his glasses and opening yet another book.

"Yeah Buffster, what if your just getting your hopes up and it doesn't work? You don't want to come crashing back down to earth." Xander said putting down his book and walking up to Buffy.

Buffy got up and hugged Xander, "Thanks for caring," She said hugging him closer.

It was just a friendly hug but Xander knew he would have fantasies about this later. He had so many fantasies about him and Buffy. Most of them concerning him saving her from a very thirsty Angel. She would then thank him for staking the evil creature and reward him with a kiss followed by a lot more. Thinking of these fantasies in front of Buffy Summers made him turn as red as a tomato.

"Its you Buffster," Xander said stepping out of the hug, "Of course I care."

Giles watched the two and part of him wished that Buffy would be with Xander in the future. It was obvious that he cared for her and he was human so he wouldn't get in trouble with the watchers council. But he did really like Angel and wanted him freed of Angelus. Although some of him felt like a father and was horrified that Buffy had already lost her virginity when she was seventeen.

_But times have changed__, _He thought, _and they clearly loved each other very much, _Giles then thought again and shook his head, _I'm not even her father. _

Willow gave a massive sigh and Oz instantly came to hug her. Willow through her book on the ground and burst into tears. Everyone ran up to her straight away, Giles picked up the book and put it back on its shelf with great care.

"What is it?" Buffy asked really worried.

Now she knew Xander was right all along and she shouldn't have got her hopes up.

She blamed Willow though for making her hopes rise into the air and come crashing down with such force and pain. But it was clear Willow didn't do it intentionally and was feeling incredibly guilty about all of this.

Willow looked at her friend and felt so sorry for her, "Its just this wont be a permanent transfer."

Buffy sighed even one night with Angel would be enough for her until they found out how to get him back properly.

"It will only last one night before we can get him back for good."

Oz hugged Willow closer and was worried Buffy would hurt her. He wasn't sure that he would be able to fight off a slayer if it came to a fight with the slayer, even if he was in his werewolf form.

Buffy gave them a massive grin, "When can we get him back?"

Giles observed the scene and saw how much Angel meant to his slayer and no longer wished her with Xander but with the man she loved, even if he was a vampire and even if he would get expelled from the watchers council.

Willow watched Buffy's face and felt relieved and happy, "Tonight if you want?"

Buffy ran to hug her friend and Oz stepped away feeling relieved and slightly stupid. Buffy would never ever hurt her best friend no matter what had happened between the two.

"Tonight sounds good," Buffy said hardly able to contain her excitement.

A secret smile played on her lips as Willow talked her through what she had to do.

"You must make Angelus believe you made a mistake and that you really do love him, this will cause Angel to slightly fade away-" Willow was saying before she was interrupted by a very worried Buffy.

"Fade away! So if I make it_ to_ convincing we have no chance?"

"Exactly," Willow said, "You must make Angelus believe it but not Angel."

Buffy doubted her acting skills for that part.

They sat in silence for around an hour, Buffy gazing at the wall wondering what sort of acting Angelus would fall for. Willow had skipped studying and was constantly preparing for the spell that she would need to perform very soon. Oz had gone to lock himself in the cage early and Giles had been reading up on Angelus history and was becoming insanely worried for not only Buffy but everyone else who she held dear to her as well.

Willow broke the silence first to tell Buffy exactly what was going to happen.

"I will perform a spell at exactly 6pm so we have two more hours to be prepared. Xander has gone to the magic shop to get the ingredients for the spell."

"Buffy what will you tell your mother?" Giles asked knowing Buffy would be away all night and that Joyce would be worried.

"About that," Buffy said to Giles, "Can you and Miss Calendar take her out somewhere to a art museum or something?"

Giles gave a small smile and started to stutter. He knew Buffy was forcing him and Miss Calendar together and didn't mind one bit.

"Well I'll try," Giles stuttered, "I'll go talk to Miss Calendar, I'll see you tomorrow and Buffy," Giles said half way out of the library door.

Buffy sighed knowing what her watcher was going to say.

"Be careful," They both said at the same time and smiled before Giles was out of the library.

"What time will the spell wear off?" Buffy asked wishing it would last forever.

"I don't know but Angel will," Willow said getting her spell books ready for the evening.

Buffy gave her a quizzical look.

"He will be able to tell when Angelus is returning," Willow said simply.

Buffy ran to hug her best friend, "I don't know what I would do without you."

"Go and see him now I think it will take an hour to convince him and its half four now," Willow said gathering her books and walking out of the library with Buffy.

Buffy nodded at her best friend, gave her one more hug and ran out of the school and to the warehouse.

Angelus had been sleeping all day. He had had countless dreams of him and Buffy making love and fighting side by side. It was the best dreams he had ever had. Some felt so real and Angel was disgusted but wouldn't stop rubbing it in his face that Buffy had chosen him. When Angel felt Buffy coming Angelus knew instantly but didn't put a t-shirt on like Angel would have done.

_At least you've been working out,_Angelus thought to Angel who gave a tiny snarl.

Buffy appeared at the door moments later. Her beauty still shocked Angelus and even Angel who had seen her so many times. She stood in the doorway with her arms by her sides and staring at Angelus with a look of wonderment on her face.

"I knew you would come," Angelus smiled but then his smile faltered as a new idea popped into his head, "Unless you've come to kill me."

Buffy gave a small smile, "The first one."

Angelus returned it but staid where he was. There was a moments silence and Buffy approached him warily. She looked so fragile and vulnerable to Angelus that he seriously doubted that she had come to hurt him.

"After all," Angelus sneered when Buffy pressed her chest against his, "You can be with me physically."

If Buffy hadn't thought of all the things that Angelus might say that could show that she was acting it would have been quite obvious that that struck a cord has she hadn't thought of that. Angelus hadn't noticed Buffy's reaction but Angel had seen it and knew that she had a plan to get him to return to her. He hoped it was soon he couldn't contain himself any longer with Angelus dreams and what he wanted from Buffy.

"That's true," She whispered in what she hoped was a seductive voice.

Angelus put his hand on her waist and pulled her closer to him.

Buffy felt disgusted but kept up the pretence. Her hands rested behind her neck pulling his head down to hers. She looked into his eyes searching for Angel and Angel knew what was coming next and knew that it was for him. Angelus however thought the eyes were for him and were filled with love. He pulled her head more towards his and kissed her. The kiss seemed to go on for longer and longer and Angelus forced her mouth open and stuck his tongue down there. Buffy felt violated and vile but let Angelus run his hands down her waist and she put hers in his hair. She opened her eyes in the process and looked at Angelus clock which was just by his bed which unfortunately happened to be the direction in which he was taking her into. It was 5:58. Two more minutes in which she had to pretend and then to get Angel back.

"I love you," She said parting from him.

"I love you too," He said happily.

_She chose me_, Angelus said shooting his thoughts at Angel.

Buffy continued to kiss him and Angelus pushed her down onto the bed.

_One more minute_, Buffy thought dragging Angelus down on to the bed with her.

_One more minute, _Angel thought.

Angelus head snapped up as he heard Angels thought.

"One more minute till what?" He asked out loud, "What are you going to do? You vile disgusting little bitch! How dare you, you make me feel for you and then get rid of me. Let me tell you right now missy I'll be coming back. You want him so much and he wants you so much one thing's going to lead to another and ba da bing badda boom I'm back girlfriend."

"One more second more like," Buffy said standing up a victory smile on her lips.

Angelus shrieked in pain and felt himself leaving Angel's body. Buffy heard the shrieks of pain and terror and the shaking running through his body. If she hadn't of caught him in time he would have collapsed to the floor. She worried if Willows spell hadn't worked but when Angel finally looked into her eyes moments later she saw the kindness and gentleness there. More so however was the love in them.

"Hi," She said softly smiling.

"Hi," He said in the same voice staggering up.

She threw her arms around him and he caught her and hugged her as close to him as he could.

* * *

**More coming soon, how will their one night go and what will Angelus say when he returns? Please review and next post**** either later today or tomorrow.**


	7. One night

**Hi everyone here's the next part as promised. ****Please keep reviewing it really inspires me to continue. Again no copyright is intended at all nothing belongs to me what so ever and this is all made for fun and entertainment, no profit what so ever is being made from this fanfic. **

**Warning but: Expect a lot of fluff in this part lol. **

**

* * *

  
**

Buffy couldn't believe it; she had got her Angel back, finally. It had seemed like years rather then days. He held her close to him and comforted her as she burst into tears. One of his hands rubbed her back while the other squeezed her closer to him.

"Shh," He soothed, "I'm here it's me."

She slowly lifted her head from his shoulder and gazed into his eyes. He moved his hands from her waist and moved her hair to the back of her neck so he could see more of her pretty face. He then moved his hands to wipe away her tears. She in turn put her hands on his face like she had done so many times before and stared into his eyes. It was so strange the difference between his and Angelus even though they were the same being.

"I'm so sorry," Angel said feeling incredibly guilty.

He had caused Buffy so much pain in the past couple of days that he could hardly bare to live with himself.

Buffy sighed; trust Angel to completely blame himself.

"Did you know that that was going to happen?" Buffy said stubbornly asking whether or not Angel had known that their night would have caused Angelus to return.

"Of course I didn't," He said wiping away another tear of hers and bending his head down closer to hers.

"Did you do anything in the past couple of days?" Buffy said and before Angel could reply she continued, "No you didn't that was Angelus."

Angel tried to reply yet again but Buffy put her lips on his. The kiss was softer then Angelus had been. But it quickly progressed as they had missed and needed each other for so long. His hands sneaked down to her bum and she jumped into his arms while still kissing. Her legs swung around his waist as he supported her. After what felt like hours instead of merely minutes Buffy stopped the kiss with her finger. He lifted her more into the air so that he could look up into her eyes.

"We only have until 6am," Buffy said breaking the news to Angel.

"Just one night," Angel whispered.

Buffy nodded sadly.

"But I will get you back," She promised him.

"I know you will," Angel said moving Buffy more down his body so that they were at even level and they kissed once again.

Loads of thoughts rushed past Angel at once while they were kissing. But most of these thoughts concerned Angelus and him snogging Buffy. What if Buffy prefers him? What if she was making comparisons between the two right this moment? Buffy could feel the tension in Angel including his lips and broke off the kiss staring him in the eyes.

"Angel?" Buffy asked worried, "What is it?"

Angel was debating whether to confess his insecurities to her.

"Angelus," He said simply.

Buffy sighed and jumped down from his arms, she had thought it was obvious that she wanted Angel all along and only kissed Angelus to get Angel back.

"He means nothing to me," She said shrugging and wrapping her arms around Angel's neck.

"You can be with him though," Angel whispered.

When Buffy looked puzzled at this statement Angel simply nodded towards to bed.

Buffy made an 'oh' with her mouth. But quickly shook her head.

"I don't care about that stuff," She said stubbornly.

"I cant do anything normal with you," He said looking her away from her eyes not wanting to see when she realised that he was right and would leave him forever.

"I don't care about that stuff," She repeated once more.

"I cant even make love to you!" Angel said quite loudly breaking out of Buffy's hold and turning his back on her.

"Angel," Buffy said grabbing his hand and walking round to face him, "I love you, I've always loved you and nothing will change that fact."

When Angel didn't reply Buffy gave him a sneaky smile, "And we have tonight."

Angel gave her a grin and banished all other thoughts from his head apart from him and Buffy in this moment in time.

His hands wrapped around her waist and pulled her with such force against him. Before Buffy had chance to breath Angel's lips clamped down on hers with such urgency that just couldn't be ignored. They needed a lot of time to talk but their passion was so strong that nothing else could be addressed. Buffy jumped into Angels arms once more and they were just a foot away from the bed when Buffy stopped the kiss with a worried look.

"Wont this just make him come back faster?"

Angel's worried thoughts about Buffy wanting Angelus more then him quickly disappeared. He knew Buffy never wanted him to leave her again and be replaced with such a monster, even if he did look like him and could make love to her without losing his soul.

Angel shook his head, "I can feel the spell preventing him from coming back and we have till 6am no matter what we do."

Buffy gave a massive smile and their lips met once more. Angel gently laid Buffy down on the bed and their clothes went away with in an instance.

Hours later Buffy was refusing to fall asleep in Angel's arms, she didn't want to miss one second with him. It was 1am and they only had five hours left with each other. Now was the time for talking. They looked at each other at exactly the same time and hugged each other tighter and nodded in agreement that it was time that they talked.

"Where you always in there?" Buffy asked.

As weird as the question actually was Angel understood that Buffy was asking him whether when Angelus was controlling his body if he was still in it but not being able to take control.

"I always was," Angel said tightening his arm around Buffy's waist, "But I almost faded away a couple of times."

Buffy looked from Angels chest to his head.

"When?" She asked worried if it was when she showed pretend feelings towards Angelus.

"When you were with Angelus, no matter if it was admitting your fake love to him or kissing him."

"That was for you," She said sternly.

"I know I know," Angel whispered kissing her forehead, "But it hurt me deeply I thought you wanted him and I was being pulled away."

Buffy manoeuvred herself so that she was on top of Angel. She bent down to kiss him.

"Everything I did was always for you," She whispered before bending down to kiss him again.

The talking ceased for another three hours. When they stopped it was 4am.

"Time goes so fast," Angel said sighing.

"I want to stop it," Buffy said sadly.

Angel nodded in agreement.

"Can you warn me before he comes?" Buffy asked Angel.

She didn't want the change to occur without warning and letting Angelus see her naked yet again. She wanted dignity when she saw him again and she needed her strength.

"I don't want you to be here when he comes," Angel said worried that Angelus would try to hurt her.

Buffy gave a tiny laugh, "Angel I'm a big girl I can take care of myself."

Angel wanted Buffy safe like he always did, "Buffy he knows you, he will hurt you. You cannot fall him again he's not _that_ stupid."

Buffy knew Angel was worried madly for her and part of it made sense but she wouldn't leave him any earlier then she had to.

"What if I run home?" Buffy asked, "He cant get to me there and he would have to leave soon because of the sun."

"I'll let you do that but I want you to have a five minute start," Angel said sternly.

Buffy gave a deep sigh but let Angel get what he wanted.

The talking stopped moments later as Angel kissed Buffy and didn't stop for a long while.

"Buffy we have 30 minutes," Angel said sadly at 5:30.

Buffy gave a deep sigh and reluctantly threw herself out of the bed with Angel's help and got dressed.

"I cant lose you again," Buffy said sadly walking up to Angel.

"You wont," Angel replied taking hold of Buffy's hands.

"Everything I do with Angelus is for you," Buffy said bringing herself closer to Angel while still holding on to his hands.

A sadness hit Angel, so she might be doing more with Angelus? That hurt Angel more then anything. Buffy could tell what he was feeling from the look in his eyes.

"If I have to do anything else which I really don't want to. I can tell the difference between him and you even if you are the same person part from you having a soul. And he kisses different and I seriously don't like him and no one could ever compare to you," Buffy said mega fast then took a pause and saw Angel digesting all of the information she had just given him. "And now I'm sounding a bit like Willow aren't I?"

Angel gave her a soft chuckle which melted away all her doubts and fears.

"I love you," She said sighing as she wound her finger threw his hair.

"I love you too," Angel said looking her straight in the eye.

Buffy turned from his embrace to stare at the clock. She had twenty minutes before she had to leave. She turned back to Angel wanting to ask him if she could just stay and see him transfer and deal with Angelus by herself but Angel knew what she was about to ask and shook his head. Buffy agreed it was a kind of stupid idea.

"I will get you back Angel I swear I will," She said not only trying to make Angel believe it but herself as well.

Angel felt helpless, he couldn't do anything he was just trapped inside his own body not being able to do anything and watching the love of his very long life having to put up with a savage demon version of himself who had erotic fantasies about her.

"We still have eighteen minutes," Angel commented eyeing the clock.

Buffy grinned at him and stared at the bed.

"This time though," She said as Angel gently laid her down there again, "We keep the clothes on."

Angel smiled, "Agreed."

"Buffy," Angel whispered in her ear as he disentangled himself from her, "We have five minutes."

Buffy stared into his eyes and tried not to burst into tears. Within seconds both were wiping each other tears away.

"What if I can't do it?" Buffy said sobbing.

Angel picked her up for the last time that night and moved her body so there heads were at equal length and he could easily stare into her eyes.

"You will I know you will," Angel said wiping yet another tear away.

He staggered backwards moments later as he felt an angry Angelus try to consume him.

"Time to go," He whispered to Buffy.

She gave him a gentle kiss which both of them wanted to turn into more but knew they didn't have enough time. She jumped down from his grip and gathered her bags. She managed to walk evenly and not turn round until she got to the door.

"Bye," She said trying not to show any tears.

Angel gave her a warm smile and replied, "Bye."

He felt darkness pull on him again and screamed in agony.

"GO BUFFY GET OUT NOW!" He managed to shout to her.

She didn't want to leave him in this state but did as he had asked and ran out hearing the agony's and screams of her boyfriend as she escaped his evil demon.

Angel tried to resist it but Angelus was winning. The battle for his body remained for five minutes. Angel had collapsed on the floor and was shrieking in pain and rage. He looked at the cloak, one second till 6am. His last thought was of Buffy and hoping she had gotten home in time. Angelus overtook his body then and in one more single shriek of pain Angel was refined to his cage again.

"Buffy," Angelus roared, "I'm home.


	8. The difference between knowing and doing

**Hi everyone well my computer has crashed and I'm now stuck on a crummy old laptop which I seriously hate. So since the internet is so slow and I have nothing else to do on this thing expect**** a lot more parts coming sooner but please keep reviewing it really does mean a lot to me. Anyway no copyright intended as per usual I own nothing as per unfortunately usual and this is made for fun and entertainment purposes not profit. **

**By the way I kind of took ideas from episode 12 of season two where Buffy****'s mum finds her with her clothes still on at night and not in bed and then getting grounded (in this paragraph with her mum. )**

**Now I shall continue with the story lol.**

**

* * *

  
**

Buffy had heard Angel's screams and cries of desperation as he was pulled back once more. It had taken all of her will power to resist running back to that old dank warehouse and rush into his arms even if it was for just a second. She wanted to tell him it was alright and catch him when he had fallen. She needed to tell him she would save him once more so he wouldn't give up hope on her. But the last thing he had told her was to go and escape. So she did what he had wished of her and saved herself. She managed to get home without any advancement from what would probably be a very mean and evil Angelus. She crawled into her bedroom window and jumped into bed as soon as she heard the door open.

"Buffy," Joyce whispered coming closer to her daughter who was pretending to be asleep.

"Buffy?" She repeated.

Buffy fluttered her eyes and gave a fake yawn which seemed to satisfy Joyce.

Joyce felt extremely guilty; she had been out all night with Rupert Giles and Jenny Calendar. They had gone to several art museums which seemed to satisfy all of them for their entertainment purposes. Then they had gone to a posh restaurant where Rupert had insisted that he pay the bills. She hadn't got back till very late and didn't want to interrupt her sleeping daughter. She hadn't even checked on her till this very moment, so how was she supposed to know that when she pulled back the bed covers that she would find Buffy still dressed in her school clothes? This hadn't been the first time Joyce had caught Buffy like this, but last time she had caught her just after midnight. This, however, was hours off of that time and it was clear that Buffy had not spent the night in their house.

"Buffy Anne Summers," Joyce said angrily.

"I can explain," Buffy said with a shaking voice as she rose from the bed.

Joyce raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms.

"Actually," Buffy said sighing, "I really cant."

Joyce tried to keep her calm straight face on but felt like she would soon explode with rage.

"You are never allowed to leave this house unless I say so," Joyce said raising her finger to Buffy, "You come straight home after school and you go straight to your room and never come out unless I say so, not even for the toilet."

Buffy didn't argue, she got washed and dressed and headed to school without meeting her mothers watchful gaze. Part of her hadn't even registered the fact that she was grounded and in serious trouble with her mum. No, that part was still focusing on the amazing night her and Angel had shared. _Maybe Willow could perform that spell more often so there would be more nights like that one, _Buffy thought. But just as instantly as she thought it she shook her head to wash it right out. 'More nights like that' would mean that she wouldn't be able to get Angel back any time soon. But if she got Willow to keep performing the spell then her and Angel could make love without the danger of him losing his soul moments after. She stopped that trail of thought right there, she didn't care about that stuff like she had told him and she was sticking to her word.

She still had fifteen odd minutes before her first lesson started so she decided to run to the library to tell the others of how Willow's spell had worked its magic.

"Do you think it worked?" Willow asked Oz, Xander and a very tired Giles.

She was pacing up and down the library as she was thinking.

"What if it didn't work and I got it wrong and she went to meet Angelus and pretend that she loved him-" Willow began before Xander interrupted her.

"Pretend that she loved him? What does that _exactly_ entail?"

"Well," Willow began seriously not wanting this conversation at the moment, "She would have to tell him she loved him, kiss him. Okay ok she would have to generally make out with him and time it exactly right so that before he could take it another step to far the spell would work and Angel would return."

Xander's jaw dropped open in disgust and he suddenly became angry with Willow, what if she had got it wrong and Angelus had taken it too far with Buffy?

Before Xander could give Willow a very angry reply a very happy Buffy skipped lightly into the room, her hair flowing behind her. She always looked like a mega hot superhero no matter what had happened to her, Xander closed his mouth before any drool could come out.

"It worked?" Giles asked standing up nervously.

"Like a charm," Buffy said giving Willow her sneaky secret smile.

Willow knew her best friend would tell her everything later, when they were out of earshot from the boys.

"So you and him," Xander said making gestures with his hands as he didn't know what to say.

"Me and Angelus no," Buffy waving that assumption aside quickly she turned to address her best friend, "Your spell worked just in time," Buffy stared around the room before turning back to Willow to whisper, "He was getting a little eager."

"Buffy that was very dangerous," Giles said.

"I know Giles but it worked I got him back!" Buffy said happily picking up a book from one of the very large piles that Giles and Willow and made of books that could tell how to get Angels soul back.

"So Buffster anymore clues on how to get the softie back for good?" Xander asked taking the book Buffy gave him.

Buffy handed everyone a book and they all sat down to read.

"Why do you think we are looking at these?" Oz asked in answer to Xander's question.

"Ahh good point werewolf man," Xander said winking.

They all sat in silence reading their assigned books.

Willow jumped in her chair and Oz instantly went to see what was wrong. Willow rushed up to collect another book and skimmed through the pages.

"I've found it," She said looking up from the book slowly to Buffy.

Giles stood up and went to get the book Willow was offering him. Buffy sat where she was watching her watcher read through the pages that possibly contained the answer to get Angel back. Giles eyes lit up with an instant but soon became darker and looked at Buffy.

"I can't let you do this," He warned, "It's to dangerous."

Buffy contained her excitement and waved aside Giles warning.

Xander went to read the solution and almost puked. He looked at Buffy with a serious look on his face which was most un-Xander like.

"Buffster you can't actually consider this," He said standing his ground.

Oz wanted to know what was going on and the second he read the solution his eyes became very dark and he hugged Willow closer to him. Buffy became impatient. They all disapproved of what she had to do to get Angel back but hadn't even told her what was so dangerous about it. She got up out of her chair and went to see the book which, to her, looked like a shining light. But the minute she approached Xander and Giles tried to take it from Willow's grasp so she couldn't. Willow held on and Oz obviously agreed that Buffy had a right to know what she had to do that he held on with Willow. Xander and Giles hadn't expected Oz's interference and staggered backwards, Xander actually fell over.

"I don't like the amount of strength you have Oz," Xander said standing back up, "It makes me feel like a wimp."

Oz gave a small smile and shrugged. Before Giles and Xander could make another move for the book Willow ran to Buffy and shoved it into her arms. Buffy cradled the book and Giles and Xander didn't even try to stop her reading it. It would be a waste less effort after all. Buffy gave a small laugh.

"This should be easy," Buffy said feigning worry, "Nothing will happen to me."

Just then the school bell went which meant that everyone had to get to their classes straight away. When the Scooby gang looked round from the bell Buffy was no longer there. Willow looked at Oz with a worried expression.

"What if it goes wrong?" She asked as he cradled.

"It won't," He soothed not actually believing it.

Xander stared at Giles and nodded his head and was just about to follow after Buffy to stop her but Giles grabbed his hand and shook his head. Xander made a loud noise of desperation, grabbed his books and headed to class.

Giles sighed and silently went to his tiny office and got out a bottle of whisky. He took a

swig and sank down into his chair while also putting his head in his hands.

Willow and Oz looked at each other once more and hand in hand they walked to their classes.

Joyce would still think Buffy was in school which she meant she could see Angelus and carry out this plan straight away and get Angel back for good. She ran past the graveyards and houses which all seemed to lurk over her or try to stop her from going to that warehouse. She made it there within a few short minutes. She opened the door and quickly shut it so that no light would enter.

"See you've returned," Angelus said standing up from his chair and throwing his empty bottle of alcohol into the fire.

The glass cracked on the side of the fireplace and Buffy had to duck to shield herself.

"Got anymore tricks up your sleeve?" Angelus asked calmly trying not to break down in front of her.

Buffy shook her head and came up to Angelus. He just resisted of walking backwards by a couple of steps. He would never admit it but some of him was scared of this tiny slayer.

"That night with Angel was a mistake," Buffy said looking up into Angelus eyes.

She saw the surprise there and also satisfaction.

_Knew she wouldn't want you, _Angelus thought to Angel.

"It's you I need," Buffy said taking one of Angelus hands, "It's you I want."

"Prove it," Angelus said nastily.


	9. A different turn

**Hi everyone thank you reviewing this fanfic and I really hope you continue to do so as it gives me feedback and inspiration to continue. As usual no copyright is intended in anyway this has been made for entertainment purposes not money at all. Now then let****'s continue with the story.**

**

* * *

  
**

Buffy and Angel had both been taken by surprise. Buffy hadn't expected the turn that these events had taken. She knew she would have to put herself in danger to get Angel to return to her but she had thought along a very different path. Perhaps Angelus wouldn't have believed her and would try to kill her. Obviously she had given Angelus a bit too much credit since he had fallen for her lies after all. But, thinking about it this could be another way to let Angel get his soul back and control his body once more. If she was willing to let Angelus do this to her then perhaps Angel could stop it before it went too far?

_You're a disgusting creature__, _Angel snarled.

He knew what Buffy was putting on was just an act and would never go through with it. But what if she was going to and it was all part of a plan to release him? Angel didn't want her to sacrifice herself to such a monster.

_I'll just have to pretend __its Angel,_ Buffy thought softly with dread.

She didn't even want to kiss Angelus again no matter how much she tried to force herself to believe it was Angel. Angel and Angelus might be the same body but Buffy could instantly tell them apart. It was look in their eyes, or the touch of them on her skin and so many more things she could tell the difference between the two. It proved she loved Angel more then anything.

_Come on you had your chance, _Angelus thought back at Angel, _and obviously you disappointed her._

Angel managed to hold back a chuckle to show Angelus how wrong he actually was but didn't want to give the game away. Buffy mustn't have to thoroughly go through with this to get Angel back, she must have more pride. Then again, she was madly in love with him and would do anything and Angel realised that with dread. He had no clue what Buffy's plan was but hoped it wouldn't have to go any further then kissing Angelus.

Angelus stepped forward with mock pleasure washing over him everywhere. Buffy also stepped forward, though she was rather timid and felt completely vulnerable even though she knew that she would be able to fight off his advances if needed.

They took one more step towards each other and were suddenly chest against chest. Angelus looked down into Buffy's eyes and saw determination there.

"Oh," She said with a fake sneaky smile on her lips, "I'll prove it."

And with that she put her fingers roughly in his hair and dragged him down forcefully to meet his lips. Their bodies pressed together as if they couldn't get enough of each other fast enough.

_It's Angel, __its Angel, _Buffy kept repeating in her head as one of Angelus hand ran down her waist to force her closer.

Angel was forced to watch the scene as Angelus kept his eyes open for his benefit. He could see their lips moving in a familiar rhythm and Angelus hands sneaking everywhere over Buffy's body. The picture made him furious with rage and hurt and he would do anything to stop it. It was clear to Angel that Buffy wasn't comfortable with what was happening but Angelus, who knew nothing about her hadn't registered that detail yet.

_It's the sex any day, _Angelus thought triumphantly.

Thinking about sex Angel saw into Angelus head. He really planned to make Buffy go through with this to prove that she loved him. Angel felt like he had massive chains around his legs and arms. He strained and strained against them to take control of his body like he had done so many times before. But this time a rage and desire drove into him so fiercely that he felt more powerful.

Angelus hands ran down Buffy's body till her reached her legs. He pulled one of them up so that it was wrapped around his waist. Buffy would have preferred this action with Angel but let Angelus do it since soon she figured she would have Angel back.

Angelus then picked her up and finally stopped their long kiss to throw her on the bed. She landed with a soft _thump_ and felt a shred of fear as Angelus loomed over her.

"Prove it," He whispered to her and bent down to lick her ear.

Angel was getting more powerful with anger. He had to stop this terrible incident from occurring. He felt one of his arms pull free as Angelus unbuttoned Buffy's blouse.

With a shock Angelus was thrown across the room and Buffy quickly re-buttoned her blouse. Angelus head was hanging down so Buffy couldn't see it. She believed that her plan had worked and she had got Angel back.

"ANGEL!" She screamed running over to Angelus, "Thank god I got you back, I thought he was going to make me do it!"

Angelus realised what Buffy had been planning all along and quickly figured out how it was her intention to get Angel back for good this time. He slapped Buffy across the face before looking up. She flew across the room and banged into yet another wall. She knew within an instant that Angel had not returned and now the jig was up. Angelus knew what she was up to.

Angel was still straining against the rest of his chains which still held his legs and one of his arms in place. But never the less it had weakened Angelus and as he staggered to get up and move towards Buffy he fell over.

Buffy didn't know what to do but her head had hit the wall and made her slightly dizzy. She felt her eyelids droop and the last thing she saw was an angry Angelus running towards her with eyes that told her one thing, _revenge._

Angel watched as Angelus ran to what seemed as a lifeless Buffy. Her eyelids were closed and she had succumbed into a deep sleep.

_This will teach you, _Angelus thought nastily to both of them.

He bent over the girl and laid her on top of him. He moved her so that her neck was placing against his mouth. Angel struggled and managed to get yet another chain loose. Angelus roared in pain but was determined to carry out his plan which would leave Buffy Summers life in misery forever. And he literally meant forever. He bent his head to her throat and bit. Angel roared in rage and pain as he saw the life being sucked from his lover. He couldn't let Buffy die she was his Buffy.

_Oh like I'm actually going to kill her, _Angelus thought as he drank, _after this she will have to stay with me._

Angel still fought against his mind chains and threw all the emotions he was feeling he managed to get another chain loose.

_One more, _he thought to himself in encouragement.

But by the time the other chain was loose it was too late. Buffy Summers blood had been drunk and she had been forced to drink some of Angelus in return. Now the corpse of his one and only love was across his bed with bite marks puncturing nearly everywhere. Angel fully had his body back now with no more trace of Angelus but with the consequence it really hadn't been worth it. Angelus had left with one last thought, _let me return to her._

His intentions hadn't been dreadful from his point of view. He thought that if he turned Buffy into a vampire she would realise that she belonged with him and not that nancy boy Angel and she would stay with him for all of eternity. Angel howled in pain and panic at just one glance of Buffy's body. He lent over her and cradled her to his chest; she was life less but not for long. But she will never have a beating heart. She will never grow up. She will never be able to go into the sunlight. She will never have children. But the most important was that she will never be Buffy again. Like he had told her once before, 'the demon gets your body but never your soul, that's lost forever.' Her soul would be lost and an evil demon completely the opposite of her will be its replacement. He shuddered as he thought of all Buffy had lost and what people had lost her. He didn't reconsider burying her in the ground however. This was _his_ Buffy for better or for worst and he hoped that she would forgive him in the near future. The sun had been down a while now and Angel had just finished burying his love in the graveyard. He looked up at the night sky, soon she would rise. The prospect of that sent chills down Angel's spine. He shivered and thought about what his future would look like now. Buffy would probably hate him for what he had done to her or love him for it since it will be a demon instead. The demon would then try and kill all that Buffy held dear to her. It might stay with Angel though considering he was a vampire. But would he want that? He would have to stare at the demons face all the time and realise it was him who had killed her and forced her into this. He would probably try to teach the demon not to kill people and live off of animal blood which will be extremely hard. Or he could get one last look at her face and then go back into the shadows and escape somewhere else and moan over his loss there. He didn't want either of these options set out before him but knew he would have to go for one as he heard digging coming from underneath him. A dirty hand shot out of the ground and tried to claw its way out. It was obvious that she was scared and needed help. Angel hated the thing in front of him. He blamed it for Buffy's death but not half as much as he blamed himself. Never the less he grabbed the hand and helped it to pull itself out of the ground. The girl brushed herself of dirt and then stared Angel in the eyes. Her eyes widen and they showed a helpless little girl who just found someone she trusted completely. Angel himself felt helpless. This demon looked like Buffy with no difference at all. Her facial features hadn't hardened in anyway like he had expected.

"Angel," She gasped rushing forwards and throwing her arms round him.

He was in shock, the demon shouldn't want any physical company when just born, it should be hungry and hunt. He stood there not managing to wrap his arms around the girl. Tears trickled down his cheek as memories of Buffy and him flashed threw his head. When they first met and how their first kiss felt which was followed by many more to when Angelus took over him and then Buffy got him back for one night. To when Angelus was killing her and how he fought off the chains that bound him and took control of his body once more and Angelus disappearing for what he hoped was forever.

He could feel the girls sobs as she realised what had happened to her. She hadn't got a respond from Angel yet and stepped backwards to look at him with hurt filled eyes. Tears where running down both of their faces.

"I'm sorry," Angel whispered taking one last look at the girl he had loved and slowly turned round to walk away from her forever.

The girl's sobs became louder and he heard them getting closer to him. He turned to confront her expecting a fight in which he would lose because he wouldn't be able to cause _it _harm.

"What so I go through all of this for _you _and you _let _it happen to me?" Buffy screamed with pain and rage.

Angel's eyes widened this was _Buffy _and not some demon. He stood still realising that she expected an answer and tried to give her one.

"You-" He croaked, "You have your soul?"

Buffy sighed and raised her hands in the air, "Obviously, what do you think I would do? Become a monster and call myself Buffyus?"

* * *

**Hi hope this one has been more interesting then the last part which I realise was quite boring but it was like a step in a very short ladder to this part. Anyway hope that's left you with some questions please review it means a lot to me. Thanks more to come soon. **


	10. I don't think I can

**Hi everyone this fanfic is reaching its end but I loved writing it so much that I'm considering doing a sequel. Anyway please keep reading and reviewing it means so much to me. No copyright intended at all everything is made for entertainment purposes and no profit is being made from this fanfic at all. Anyway as per usual on with the story.**

Angel stood motionless as loads of thoughts flooded his mind. How was it possible that Buffy still had her soul? This was the most important unanswered question in Angel's head. He of course was glad that the demon that had possessed him wasn't strong enough to possess the slayer. _That might be the reason, _Angel thought racking his brain nervously at why Buffy Summers still had her soul, _she is the slayer._

"Well what were you going to?" Buffy roared tears streaming down her cheeks.

It was enough for her that she was a vampire, a creature of the night that she would kill in a heartbeat but the feeling of her desertion that Angel was going to cause her was to much for her none beating heart to bear.

She tried to keep calm like her mother would have done but staring at the man who she thought loved her caused her so much pain that she just couldn't keep it from her face.

Angel didn't answer he was still in to much shock to be able to form a coherent sentence.

"WELL?" Buffy screamed in his face.

She collapsed down in tears then and Angel just managed to catch her. They both fell to the floor and Angel held a broken Buffy in his arms. One of his hands rubbed soothing circles on her back while the other held her to him. So much guilt washed over him at

that moment that he wanted to go and end his life right there and then. But Buffy needed him and he still loved her so what he had been thinking was now out of the question.

"You were going to leave me," Buffy whispered not making it that much of a question.

She lifted her head from Angel's shoulder to see his reaction.

His face immediately softened and he cupped her face in his hands. He just shook his head and Buffy felt relieved.

"I'm sorry," Angel said staring Buffy in the eyes and knowing he would never be able to apologize enough, "I'm so sorry, it's all my fault if only I-"

Buffy stopped Angel by putting her finger on his lips. She didn't want to hear apologies and certainly not from Angel.

"It's not your fault," She said softly lowering her finger from his lips.

He tried to argue but the second he did Buffy put her finger right back there.

"It's not your fault," She repeated sternly, "Its Angelus fault."

Angel tried to argue yet again but this time Buffy silenced him with her lips. They kissed softly for a bit with the kiss going no where fast since Angel didn't feel right about it. When they stopped Buffy looked at him once more.

"Now then," She said trying to sort out the mess in her head so that it made sense, "I'm a vampire."

Angel nodded weakly.

"Angelus turned me into one."

Angel nodded again.

"I love you."

Angel was half way through a nod when he realised what Buffy had said.

"You still do?" He asked not bearing to believe it, "Even after what I did to you?"

Buffy gave a loud sigh and was just about it to tell him that it was Angelus but it was Angel's turn to silence her.

The kiss was slowly progressing into something more but Buffy heard her name being shouted from far away. It was weird to hear with her new ears. She could hear things so much more clearly and from miles away too. It was so serene to her. They broke off the kiss and Angel helped Buffy up from the ground. He held her close to him just in case she couldn't control her thirst for human blood. He could tell straight away who the voices belonged to. Giles was running through the graveyard past tones of tiny graves to see them. A smile etched across his face as he found his Buffy again. A tiny Willow was following behind with Oz. They all came to a stop the moment they saw her and Angel more clearly. Willow and Giles almost fainted while Oz kept silent with nothing but a surprise reaction radiating from him. Xander finally caught up with them and the minute he saw Buffy he fainted. Buffy rushed from Angel's side to awaken her friend but the moment his eyes opened he screamed terrible heart wrenching screams and crawled away from Buffy with fright. Giles just stood there with a look of loss and disappointment on his face. Willow stood gaping and grasped Oz's hand tighter to her own. Buffy rushed back to Angel instantly. What was wrong with her? She thought her friends would be more understanding then this. She looked at Angel with the question on her face but all he did was sadly take her hands and make her feel her own face. She felt the cold and ruff ness there. She knew she was now a vampire but forgot what her true face looked like now, that of a cold killer. A demon that didn't deserve to be in this world. She broke down in sobs and fell to the floor banging her fists against it. Angel took a step back and watched with guilt and fear as Buffy smashed in all the graveyard stones and sobbed. Xander was holding Willows waist in fear and despite all that was happening around them Oz still managed to look down at Xander with a warning look. Xander however didn't recognize it. A tear fell from Giles cheek as he and the others all realized that Buffy still had her soul and knew what she had become. Xander rose from Willow and walked over to Angel. He raised his hand in a fist and was just about to punch him in the face but half way there a stronger Buffy stopped him. She snarled and Xander, in shock, fell over again. She stood in front of Angel with a protective look that told anyone they were dead if they tried to harm him.

"Buffy," Willow said amazed, "It's still you. I mean well it would be you I mean its you. Well its still you, nice Buffy not grryy," She tried to make a demon face, "grr Buffy at all."

Buffy smiled at her friend and in doing so felt her face transform back into her old human one. Everyone felt more relaxed instantly around her. Angel hated the resentment there, didn't they realize they were making it harder then it already was?

"How did you keep your soul?" Giles asked puzzled taking off his glasses to wipe them and quickly put them back on again.

Buffy and Angel looked at each other, Buffy gave a tiny shrug.

"We don't exactly know," Angel said trailing off as he tried to think of reasons why Buffy still had her soul.

Xander stared as Buffy's hands found Angel's and they held each other close. It sickened him to his very core.

"How can you still feel for him when he's done this to you?" Xander sneered at Angel.

Buffy looked quickly from Angel's eyes to Xander's and he wished he hadn't have spoken.

"It wasn't him," Buffy said not only talking to Xander but to everyone else, "It was Angelus."

They all nodded wisely except Xander who just rolled his eyes.

"Keep telling yourself Buffster but you would have got older and realized you wanted a _normal _relationship and he just couldn't handle that. Now look what he's done to you," He said waving his hand in the air.

Angel got angry with Xander. It was true Angel had always known and feared that one day Buffy might want a human instead of him but he would have let her go without a fight. And for Xander to question that just made him so angry that he felt like he could burst.

Buffy stepped forward with her eyebrows raised at Xander who stood his ground glaring at Angel.

"Stop it Xander," She whispered taking his hand.

This gesture shocked Xander and he shivered as her cold skin touched his. She let go instantly in shame and returned to Angel's side.

"I would have let her go," Angel said simply containing his emotions.

Xander snorted, "Of course you would have."

Giles made a loud sigh at Xander which made him shut up instantly. Buffy felt a wave of sadness wash over her as she looked at now what she considered as her old friends. They would never look at her the same way. They would always be disgusted or in fear of her. She didn't want that in friendships and turned to stare at Angel.

"I want to go home," She whispered taking his hand.

"No don't Buffy," Giles said taking her other hand.

He flinched slightly at the cold touch but didn't remove his hand. She turned to look at him.

"You're still our Buffy," He said staring into her eyes.

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Nothing could change that Buffster," Xander said taking her other hand which he tactfully removed from Angel's grasp.

"You are still mine and ours Buffy," Willow said stepping forward with Oz and hugging Buffy, "And nothing that happens to any of us will change that."

Oz nodded in agreement.

She stood there feeling accepted once more and her and Angel quickly told the story of how she had turned. They were all sympathetic and Xander even apologized to Angel about what he had said before. Giles wanted to hug Buffy more then anything and tell her everything was going to be ok. Willow wanted to tell Buffy that they were still best friends and Xander wanted to keep apologizing for what he had said to both Buffy and Angel. But none of these things needed to be said. It was so obvious to each and every one of them what the other wanted to say. What felt like hours later Angel grabbed

Buffy's hand and pulled him towards her.

"The sunlight is coming," He whispered trying to make it so that the others wouldn't hear him.

They did though and all fell into an awkward silence. But they still made arrangements to see each other tonight at Giles house. With a quick goodbye Angel pulled Buffy back to his place just before the sun came up. They entered his place and the first thing he did was run to the fridge and through her a packet of pig's blood. Buffy turned her nose up at it and with a good hours persuasion from Angel she finally drank it. They sat in silence for a while until Buffy got fed up with it.

"So its day time," She said trying to see the light but failing knowing she never could again and feeling a great wave of sadness wash through her, "What do we do?"

Angel stared at the bed and Buffy raised her eyebrows.

"That will just bring Angelus back," She said putting her head in her hands in a depressive way.

"No," Angel said helping her out of her chair, "Bedtime."

She looked up at him and gave a slight giggle, "Oh right and I wondered what you did during the day."

Angel raised his eyebrows and Buffy gave a shrug, "I can be stupid."

Angel nodded in mock agreement and Buffy gave him a playful slap.

"It's going to take me a while to get used to sleeping during the daytime," Buffy said sitting down on the bed.

"You'll be fast asleep in a moment," Angel said getting a pillow and putting it on the floor.

Buffy couldn't believe it; he was going to sleep on the floor!

"Angel," She said sighing and was just about to complain before Angel stopped her.

"I will sleep on the floor," He said lying down.

She peered over at him, "Angel we wont do anything."

Angel didn't even matter if he lost his soul again to Buffy; he needed her body and everything about her. But he didn't feel right about it. Looking at what he had done to her he doubted he could ever just sleep in a bed with her again.

"Angel just-" Buffy said trailing off as she thought why Angel didn't want to be in the same bed as her.

He mustn't want her anymore now she was a vampire. She must have changed in more ways then she thought. She got up from the bed and tried to find a mirror. It took her a while of searching until Angel finally asked her what she was doing. She told him she needed a mirror and he looked at the floor sadly and turned his back on her.

"You can't," Angel whispered.

Buffy suddenly remembered why, vampires couldn't see their own reflections. She felt instantly guilty as she knew her thoughts before had been stupid and Angel was just ashamed of what he had done to her. Even though it wasn't him but Buffy knew he would never accept that. She walked slowly over to him; his back was still facing her. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him. She buried her face in his shoulder as he just sat there and finally turned round to face her.

"I'll take the floor," He repeated and Buffy instantly let go.

She got up on the bed in defeat and Angel watched her instantly fall asleep.


	11. You always get what you want

**I everyone I know I haven't added much action lately and thought I would add some in this one. **

**Again no copyright intended. **

**

* * *

  
**

Buffy awoke at precisely 6pm the moment in which the sun had gone down from the hell mouth. She found Angel sitting on a chair staring at her and never breaking eye contact as she got out of the bed in nothing but her underwear and walked towards him. She did have the pleasure of seeing his eyes widen in lust.

Behind Angel was all of her clothing and everything from her house. She looked at it and hoped began to rise in her stomach. They must be moving in together! Angel must have realised how stupid he was being.

Her hopes of her and Angel drowned when he through a dressing gown towards her. She took it and put it on while grabbing some clothes and without a word headed straight to the bathroom. She slammed the door shut behind her.

Angel had been battling with himself for hours. He knew he hadn't done that to Buffy but still felt like he had. He felt as if he couldn't touch her. He had never been worthy of her and now he didn't deserve her either.

He could see her breaking inside though and realised they needed to talk.

Buffy sat in the bathroom sobbing. But after ten minutes of it she knew that it was going to get her no where. She got changed into jeans and a red shirtless top and headed back out to confront Angel.

"Buffy I need-"

"Angel this is-"

"We should talk about-"

"Is there no danger or fun anymore is that-"

"I know I didn't actually do this to-"

They both stopped and stared at each other for a moment before bursting out laughing.

"You go first," Buffy said motioning with her hand for Angel to continue.

Angel walked up to her and lifted her chin so she would look at him while he let his emotions out.

"I know I didn't actually do this to you but I feel like I did," He said taking a deep breath before continuing, "I still want you, I still love you but looking at what happened because of what I wanted, what I needed," He trailed off.

Buffy staid silent for a moment before realising it was her time to speak.

"It wasn't you it was Angelus. I still love and want you and I don't blame you for this in fact its not as bad as I thought it would be."

She wanted more then anything to become human once more but she was telling the truth, it wasn't that bad. And now she could be with Angel forever.

"I just think it would be wrong just entering your life again," Angel said.

Before Buffy could react at his words a little knock on what was now their door was being made. They stared at it; no one knew they were here.

Angel opened the door cautiously and stepped back straight away as a massive beam of light emitted from the being standing before him.

"Warriors," It said entering their home, "The powers that be did not expect such a strange occurrence."

Angel backed over to Buffy and held her close to him in a protective manner.

"But they actually quite like it," The being said.

You couldn't properly make him out what with all the gold glow emitting from him but he did sound fairly Irish. Buffy frowned.

"Like it how?" She asked.

"Well now your immortal and no other slayers will need to be born which means no other girls lives with be cocked up."

Buffy was shocked along with Angel. This being didn't sound very powers of be like.

"Charming," Buffy said, "Thanks for that it makes me feel all fussy inside."

"Your welcome miss," The being said taking a little bow, "Now then the powers of be-"

Angel stepped forward but managed to still keep Buffy from the beings sight at the same time, "So what's going to happen to us?"

The demon gave a little chuckle, "Well mate the powers of be find you two so cute! And its good to have an immortal slayer so they decided to be kind and cast a spell that's like that ringy thingy that that evil guy Spike what's his name tried to have."

The couple knew instantly what ringy thingy he was on about and also knew instantly what the powers of be had granted them.

"We're allowed to go out in the sunlight?" Angel asked hardly daring to believe it.

The demon gave a little chuckle, "Yes my friend indeed you are AND they have been extra nice on the side."

Buffy couldn't believe it she was a vampire with fangs and the immortality but without actual vampire rules and being like a vampire at all.

"What's that then?" She asked hardly able to contain herself.

"Well Angel the curse has been removed and you can now have your soul with no strings attached."

Buffy squealed and hugged Angel tightly who had a tear leaking out of his eye and slowly making its way down his face.

"Why?" He choked.

"Well you two deserve some happiness don't you?" The being asked.

Buffy nodded and despite herself ran up to the being and threw her arms around him. Angel stepped forward worryingly but the gold glow went instantly and was replaced by a man with black hair who was slightly shorter then Angel.

"Doyle," He said offering his hand to the happy couple.

"Nice to meet you Doyle," Buffy said shaking his hand.

Once Doyle had gone Buffy and Angel cried with relief.

"Can you believe they can just do that?" She asked hugging him.

He buried his face in her hair; she had such a sweet smell. They looked at one another and instantly Angel's soul was put to the test.

Buffy awoke in Angel's arms, in his bed.

"This means I can go on with a normal life," Buffy said before pausing, "Well kinda."

"Looks like I'm going to have to move all your stuff back to your house," Angel said sadly.

Buffy looked up at him and her none beating heart soared. She reached to kiss him and it lasted ages.

"Soon," She whispered before returning the kiss once more.

After ages of just plain kissing since neither of them needed air, Buffy sat up.

"Shit!" She exclaimed, "My mums going to kill me!"

Angel gave a small laugh and at the same time as he pulled her back down to join him their door crashed open. A load of dust clouded the room for a couple of seconds before it cleared to reveal a very angry looking Spike.

"So it's true," He said some what between disgusted and amazement in his voice.

Buffy slipped out of Angel's tight hold and manoeuvred herself out of the room so Spike couldn't see any naked part of her. Angel glared at Spike and quickly put some pants on.

"There's nothing down there mate I don't know why you bother," Spike said mockingly nodding towards Angel's crotch.

"Same for you," Angel said striking a cord as Spike moved forward angrily.

Spike pounced on Angel just at the exact same time as Angel ran at him. They hit each other fiercely and Angel tackled Spike to the floor. Spike swung his legs at Angel and Angel toppled over him. Spike managed to get up before Angel and held him to the floor by his neck.

Spike began to hit Angel fiercely in the face and began speaking. Between every word he spoke he punched Angel.

"You always get what you bloody want!" He roared angrily.

Angel kicked his legs up at Spikes stomach and Spike flew into the air. He made a massive dent in the wall as he crashed against it. But he was so angry he needed to hurt Angel and his little girlfriend.

"For no reason you get everything!" He shouted again moving towards Angel.

Tears were leaking down Spikes face now as he advanced once more.

Angel was shocked what had happened to Spike to make him act like this?

"I mean you bloody turn the girl into a demon that she fights everyday and how does she punish you? By letting you get in her pants!" He hit a stunned Angel and Angel fell to the floor.

"Then for no reason other then the powers of be think your cute you get to have your soul back completely and go out in the bloody sunlight!" Spike roared and retrieved a stake from his pocket.

Angel made a move to get up but Spike just knocked him back down and stood over him. Blood was pouring all down Angel's face and he whispered Buffy before the stake plunged through the air towards him.

Buffy was thankful Spike hadn't seen all of her and rummaged around in Angel's closet. She needed to be quick it was obvious the two were fighting and she wanted to help Angel teach that Spike a lesson. She grabbed a pair of Angel's boxers and slipped them on hurriedly and stole one of his shirts while he was at it. She heard her name breathed through worried and saddened lips and ran to the bedroom. She saw a tear stained Spike with a stake standing above Angel. She rushed forwards and sent Spike flying. She then helped a shocked Angel up and ran to kick Spike in the face. She took the stake from him and was just about to turn the mean vampire to dust but a hand stopped her. And it wasn't Spike.

Angel had seen his death coming in the form of Spike but soon that death was sent flying across the room and landed on his back. He saw an angry Buffy who turned round to face him and her face immediately softened when she saw his bruises. She held out her hand and he gratefully took it but the minute she helped him up she ran back to Spike and picked up the stake. Angel knew there was something wrong with Spike and needed to know what it was before his life ended. He just managed to stop Buffy from staking him. The touch of her sent warm shivers down his spine as it usually did. She looked up puzzled at him but he simply just shook his head and Buffy sighed and stood back. She disposed of the stake out of the window.

"What do you want Spike?" She spat as Angel held him against the wall.

"Both of you dead," Spike said through gritted teeth.

Angel held him tighter around the neck causing Spike to gasp in pain.

"What a charming gentlemen you are," Buffy said sitting down on hers and Angel's bed.

"Why do you want us dead then?" Angel asked moving Spike further away from Buffy.

"It's ridiculous!" Spike roared, "You get everything you want and what about poor Spike hey? What does he get? I'll tell you what poor Spike gets!"

Buffy made a very loud sigh and settled down for a long story.

* * *

**Hoped everyone enjoyed this part and let****'s pretend the powers that be are me and that's why they got everything they wanted lol. Also if they hadn't then there would be no Spike in this bit. Btw I haven't seen Angel series one in years and couldn't remember if Doyle was Irish so sorry if I got that wrong. **


	12. The great actress

**No copyright intended made for entertainment purposes. Nothing belongs to me!**** To some people who think its stupid that Buffy is ok with being a vampire give me a chance because I haven't wrote the whole story and I had a chapter planned when she's not ok with it which is in fact this chapter so hope I satisfy everyone. Not many more to go now wooo:D. **

**

* * *

  
**

"Wow Buffster look who is blessed!" Xander said bowing to his best friend the next day at school.

She playfully slapped him but because of her extra vampire strength it hurt but he didn't show it.

"Well yay Buffy," Cordelia said sarcastically grabbing her coat from the library chair and moving towards the little group of freaks, "I mean I only came here because I heard something in a closet and I got worried."

She said this with eyeing Xander.

"Maybe we should check in some closets Xander," Cordelia said sneakily.

"Can you not see I'm chatting to my best friends? Get some eyes," Xander moaned having no clue what Cordelia wanted.

Buffy and Willow turned round to face Xander and once their backs where turned Cordelia mouthed what she wanted in a closet. Xander patted Buffy and Willow and left with Cordelia without a word.

"I swear they are getting strange," Willow said to Buffy as they took a chair, "er I mean."

Willow had noticed something off with her friend ever since she turned into a vampire and now she knew she was going to find out what was wrong.

"Will," Buffy said putting her head in her hands.

Willow didn't know but Buffy more then anything wanted to bang her head none stop against the table.

"Yeah?" Willow asked attentively taking Buffy's hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.

Buffy looked up at her best friend and was so glad she had her to confide in.

"I don't think I can do this," She whispered.

Willow squeezed her hand harder suddenly worried about what her friend was planning to do to herself.

"I mean I fake it for Angel," Buffy said almost in tears, "But I've become the very thing I've hated and fought for so many years Will."

Willow couldn't believe it. Buffy was a better actress then everyone gave her credit for, she had no clue that Buffy felt this way.

Everyone had fallen for it. Sure they thought that it was strange that Buffy was ok with being an actual vampire after all she was the slayer and Willow even envied her a tiny bit.

She was with the guy she loved, they were going to live for eternity never changing. And even though they were vampires they had their souls and could even go out in the sunlight. And Buffy was complaining? But Willow pushed all the jealously aside and tried to understand where Buffy Summers was coming from.

"But Buffy," Willow said taking both of her hands, "You have a soul."

Buffy stood up angrily, "It doesn't matter!" She roared and was shocked at how her voice sounded when she was mad.

Willow almost fell out of her chair. Buffy looked at her and mouthed sorry. Willow slowly got up and put her arm around Buffy.

"Angel has a soul," Willow stated.

_That's __right Angel does have a soul,_ Buffy thought, _and he's still doing good._

"And you love Angel even though he's a vampire," Willow said stepping back to see Buffy nod.

"It's just hard Willow I feel like," She stuttered the next words, "I feel like slaying myself."

Willow nodded her hand in a way to show she understood.

"And," She continued trying to cheer Buffy up, "You will now never grow old."

Buffy sat back down, "I'll never grow old," She repeated as if she was just realising it.

Willow tried to talk but Buffy stopped her, "No, I'll see you lot growing old and wither and die and I'll be stuck like this!"

Willow was shocked she had never thought about that.

"But you get to be with Angel for eternity," Willow pointed out smiling.

Buffy hadn't thought about that and a small smile came to her face at the idea of it but it quickly went as she thought of another thing.

"We will never get any peace because now I'm going to be the slayer forever!" Buffy cried whacking her head against a table, "You see that didn't even hurt."

"Buffy you will get used to it and Angel and you can be together without Angelus even returning AND you can go in the sunlight."

Buffy nodded slowly knowing that everyday for the rest of her friends lives she will be breaking down inside and feeling guilty whenever she was happy. She shouldn't be like this.

Just then Xander walked back in and Buffy placed a big fake smile on her face but Xander was obviously to preoccupied with his thoughts to notice. He slumped down on the chair opposite Buffy looking mighty proud of himself.

"How where the closets?" Willow asked staring at Xander's ruffled and messy hair frowning.

"Cordelia was just being stupid," Xander said waving a hand aside.

"As usual," Buffy commented.

"Anyway what was wrong with Spike?" Xander asked and they all frowned at him once more.

"What? I don't actually care about the guy but I'm nosy," Xander said.

Angel was sitting with Spike at his and Buffy's apartment. Spike was turning up his nose at the pig's blood that sat in a mug before him.

"I bet with a bit more time," Spike said eyeing the mug, "Angelus would have been a bigger poof then you, he was certainly getting that way."

Angel ignored the comment and just stared at Spike like he had been doing all day. He was waiting for Buffy. She would finish school soon and then she had to face her mum who was probably insanely worried about her. He would then climb through her window, leaving Spike tied up here and discuss what they were going to do with him.

"Dru would kill you if you offered her that," Spike said proudly.

"I don't think so," Angel said sneering, "Not if I was the one serving it."

Spike roared in anger and tried to pry himself away from the wall to throw himself at an amused Angel.

"In fact she wouldn't if anybody other then you offered her it," Angel said smiling at Spike, "She's always been a bit slutty."

"How dare you!" Spike roared trying again to get loose.

"I don't even know why you care about her anymore not after she went off with one of her dollies instead of you," Angel said laughing, "I mean the dolly isn't even real and it was a female."

Spike yelled insults at Angel before finally calming down and knowing how to hit Angel hard, emotionally.

"And you think everything's sunny in your little sad relationship?" He asked beaming.

Angel was surprised, Buffy had accepted the fact that she was now a vampire and now they were like humans but with fangs.

"I'll tell ya something," Spike said leaning forward, "It's not. Think about it Angel, she's a thing she's been fighting for so long and you think that she's going to accept that straight away? You'd be lucky."

Angel was stunned and hurt and Spike lent back against the wall in triumphant.

Angel climbed through Buffy's window a while later and found her rocking herself on the bed. She looked up at him and smiled but didn't have the will to move towards him. He took that as a sign that she didn't want him anymore because of what he had done to her. He turned towards the window to go and wait until she was ready or never. It saddened him and he was more then happy when she caught his hand and stopped him.

"What are you doing?" She asking confused.

"I know you can't deal with it," Angel whispered looking into her eyes.

He was hurt when they widened to show that he was right. Her eyes turned sad as she stared at him.

"You need to give me time," She said pressing herself against him.

He nodded knowing what she meant and put his arms around her.

"Do you want me to go?" He asked.

Pain ached in his heart as he waited just a mere second for Buffy to answer.

"Of course not," She said pressing herself closer against him and looking in his eyes.

"How did it go with your mum?" He asked wanting to get off of the subject.

"Not good," She said sitting down on her bed and pulling Angel down with her, "I've been grounded and yelled at. Then again I deserve it."

Angel stared at the bed hungrily but knowing now that Buffy wasn't comfortable with being a vampire just yet he wasn't going to do anything about it.

Buffy saw his eyes though and smiled.

"I wouldn't feel right doing it here," She said.

"Of course," Angel said nodding, "Your mother."

Buffy nodded in return.

"And we cant do it at mine because of Spike," Angel said trailing off sadly.

"What are we going to do about Spike?" Buffy asked suddenly remembering the vampire she hated so much.

After hours of discussing what to do with Spike they thought of a plan and laughed at how simple it was. They got down writing the letter together and then Angel sneaked out of the window and ran to give it to the very lucky Drusilla. He caught her kissing a dolly. He wasn't that shocked but sad, he had made her this mad.

"Daddy," Drusilla said smiling standing up, "Daddy I want you to meet Petunia."

Angel just stared at the brunette haired doll for a second and then handed Drusilla the note.

"Look Petunia," Drusilla said taking the letter, "Daddy's brought us something."

Angel left the minute the letter was out of his hand. He spent the rest of the night with Buffy just holding her as she fell asleep. It was so hard for him to fall asleep during the night time but with Buffy he slowly got used to it. When they returned to his apartment they found the wall ripped of chains and no Spike. They turned round to look at each other and smiled.

* * *

**One more chapter after this hope you enjoyed it and please R&R.**


	13. Pretty luckyfor vampires

**Hi everyone this is the last chapter in this fanfic. ****Sorry it's took me so long to write this last chapter but if you liked this I have two more Buffy/Angel fanfics you should check out. :D I enjoyed writing this so much and all your reviews are so kind and help me think of what to write next. I hope you all continue to review once you have read this. It will mean so much to me. Anyway no copyright intended and I don't own anything no matter how hard I wish. Made for entertainment and plain fun.**

It had been a year, a whole year since Buffy became a vampire. She had watched all her friends and family get a year older where as she stayed the same like she always would. She would put on a smile and pretend it didn't affect her and everyone fell for it but Angel still had his doubts.

She and Angel hadn't gone further then kissing since the night that Doyle visited. Buffy hadn't realised what she was then and that was why at the time. But now she knew and didn't feel comfortable with it. She loved Angel more then anything and it was plain that he felt the same but sometimes when they kissed she felt the intensity of Angelus and had to stop.

Angel didn't want to pressure Buffy, he didn't know what was stopping her from being with him physically but he had a good idea. He never pressured her and she appreciated that but they soon became more distant with every kiss. They loved each other just as much every time, nothing could change that.

Willow had grown a year older with her werewolf boyfriend Oz and been happy but whenever she saw Buffy she knew what she was going through and saw how Angel felt rejected. She knew it was tearing the couple apart and needed to talk to Buffy about it, maybe give her some advice. Her magic was growing fast and she was one of the most powerful wickers around.

_________________

Buffy entered the library in the morning as usual but Willow had made sure that everyone remained out of her way as she had a private talk with Buffy. Buffy was surprised and a little anxious when she saw only Willow in the library and sat down cautiously, it was clear Willow wanted to talk to her about something important.

"Buffy," Willow said and then said mega fast, "I know it's hard for you and everything but you have it better then all the vampires. You can go out in the sunlight, you still have your soul and you have someone who loves you. But I see how you and Angel react around each other. He's starting to know Buffy, your distancing yourself from him. Angelus isn't there anymore, you saved Angel and now Angelus is gone. You need to accept the fact and be happy that way you and Angel will be together _forever._"

Willow took a deep breath and stopped her friend from talking, "And if you don't accept this fact I will personally get a very large stake and prod you everywhere until you do."

Buffy gave a little laugh but knew Willow was right. It was hard hearing what she had said but she was shocked. She hadn't known Angel felt that way. She must be so wrapped up in herself to notice him, _I'm so selfish, _she thought hanging her head in shame.

The girls talked for hours on end. And if Giles or even Xander came in then they would snap at them and shove them back out again.

* * *

Angel walked back home, he loved the feeling of being able to walk in the sunlight even after a year. But he walked alone. Buffy and Willow were still talking in the library and he didn't want to interrupt them. When he had walked in Buffy had appeared a little upset, determined and happy. The mix of emotions confused Angel and knew he would just have to wait for Buffy to come home before he found out anything about it.

He closed his eyes and sighed before he opened the door. Within a flash he felt a pair of cool arms wrap around him and all he could see was blonde hair, he recognized it instantly and his arms responded in the same way to her body. But he would not kiss her; he didn't want to, he didn't want to drive them further apart. He stared down at her and smiled as she stared up at him but what he saw wasn't the usual weariness in her eyes. It was something much different, determination and lust. His eyebrows furrowed together in confusion as he looked into them.

He felt his head being pushed downwards towards hers and before he knew it their lips were touching. His body responded automatically as her hands slid into his hair and she jumped into his arms. Their kiss quickly became passionate and furious as if they both knew that they wouldn't regret this. It was clear that Buffy still needed to time to get used to her predicament but there were no more problems with her and Angel. And as they headed to the bedroom she knew that they were pretty lucky…..for vampires.


End file.
